Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Ok moms I really need your help here...

Ok so my boyfriend has a child with another woman. Ive known him for about six years and I know the situation so im sure there are no lies. He took care of his daughter for the first year of her life, worked 12 hour days came home cleaned and cooked and got up with her in the middle of the night even when he had to work the next day... She decided to leave and go to North Carolina, we are in Oklahoma BTW, and get married up there. She keeps calling my boyfriend and keeps changing her story on when he can see her. Now she is saying that she is not his, when we all know she is, and saying that he is never gonna get to see her again and that they are moving and changing theyre numbers and that shes gonna tell the little girl that her husband is her dad and she will never even know. Ive been racking my brain trying to think of what we can do to get that little girl where she belongs but I know how hard it is for the dad to get...

Answer Question
 
ladybug.ky88

Asked by ladybug.ky88 at 1:31 PM on Jun. 17, 2009 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • custody especially in this state.... Any help PLEASE??????????????
    ladybug.ky88

    Answer by ladybug.ky88 at 1:32 PM on Jun. 17, 2009

  • I'm glad you care for the child.I am a step mom.and we have no rights or say so in these matters.He is just gonna have to jump thru the legal hoops to force visitation.And it is just sad.It sounds like he loves his child.
    evelynwest

    Answer by evelynwest at 1:35 PM on Jun. 17, 2009

  • id say take her to court theyll order a dna test and go from there. once its proven legally that the child is his he can fight for custody or joint or whatever. but before they do anything theyll want to have legal documents saying he is the childs father, then after that other things can start taking place.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:36 PM on Jun. 17, 2009

  • First is his name on the birth certificate? If it is the battle will be shorter. He needs to get a lawyer. It is the quickest way to cut through the BS. He will need to file for things like visitation, ask for injunctions against her moving and he may wind up taking a paternity test if she continues to state he isn't the father. I don't know about OK but I know here...after 90 days if the paternity isn't challenged it basically takes an act of God to get it off the birth cert. Encourage hi to fight for his child. Begin a log and note all phone, text, email conversations. Write the time, date, content and length og all contact. Good Luck.
    GrnEyedGrandma

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 1:43 PM on Jun. 17, 2009

  • Have your bf request a DNA test then go from there. So call an attorney. Many will do free consultations. You can also see if you can get free advice from a lawyer on www.avvo.com (that is 2 v's not a w)
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 1:48 PM on Jun. 17, 2009

  • She keeps saying that they are getting the DNA test and everything but I think that she is just making any and every excuse for him to not get to see her... I know that he needs to get an attourney and file for custody. What is everyones opinions on fathers getting custody?? Does it happen. Can it happen??
    ladybug.ky88

    Answer by ladybug.ky88 at 1:54 PM on Jun. 17, 2009

  • before the child left he should have gotten joint custody. as a father he do have rights. women can un-fourtanatley, hold that over a man's head, which ruins the children, as well as the father. the only thing he can do is go to court and let the courts handle this, if he has her social security # he can find her and the mother will look bad in court. good luck to you
    mememommie

    Answer by mememommie at 1:54 PM on Jun. 17, 2009

  • Try this website...you can join it for free and ask your questions...

    www.lawyers.com
    Dannee

    Answer by Dannee at 2:06 PM on Jun. 17, 2009

  • I'd get the court system involved. if his signature is on her birth papers, etc, you got a case you can win. unless she has a reason, like he is a convicted felon or a deadbeat (which it obviously doesnt sound like he is lol). GL and I hope he gets to see his baby!!!
    Owl_Feather

    Answer by Owl_Feather at 2:08 PM on Jun. 17, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.