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My son is out of control. He is six and in the last week he has lost 3 pairs of shoes, hit three other kids, and gotten hit by a car while on his bike *he is ok!)...but how to manage his bad behavior???

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Asked by BetoandKikisMom at 3:46 PM on Jun. 17, 2009 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

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Answers (9)
  • Are these behaviors new to your son or has he always had difficulty staying "in control" since he was much smaller? Did he loose the shoes at home or while he was away from home? Does he also have behavior problems at school? Do you think he can really stay in control or is he hyperactive to the point where he cannot no matter what you do or say stay in control of himself? More information like this will help us answer your question. Thanks!

    Answer by LovetoTeach247 at 3:58 PM on Jun. 17, 2009

  • Thanks for your response--forgot to mention that my son was diagnosed at age 4 and 1/2 with ADHD by our family doctor and recommended a specialist. So last year I had my son tested at our local Children's Hospital and he was confirmed as having "severe behavioral issues related ONLY to ADHD". They recommended a combination of medication and behavioral therapy. He had been on Adderall XR for nearly a year. I work as much as I can (as a single mom) with him on his behavior issues, but it gets really tough sometimes. My other child, my 7 year old daughter, gets fed up very quickly as well. Many other adults in our lives struggle with managing his behaviors too (teachers, my parents, other friends and relatives, etc.)...Any advice is welcome. Some days I feel at my wits end.

    Answer by BetoandKikisMom at 4:03 PM on Jun. 17, 2009

  • putting a child that young on adderall is very dangerous. i would suggest more natural ways to go about it rather than a quick fix like meds, have you tried yoga? i know crazy but it completely got rid of my adhd, there are also sensory things you can do like emdr thats awesome and helps a lot.

    Answer by rozepyle at 5:42 PM on Jun. 17, 2009

  • How about therapy for both of you. For him to help control his emotions and learn how to deal with life. For you to learn how to deal with him. You have your hands full and there is nothing wrong with saying "I need help". I have to ask why is your 6 year old in a situation where he is riding his bike in traffic?

    Answer by mistynights234 at 9:49 PM on Jun. 17, 2009

  • dont feel bad my son ties pipe cleaners around his ears for antenae, and puts one in his mouth for pinchers and pretends to be an ant ...he also uses the pool noodles as a tail to be somekind of reptile pirhanna plant... hes 8

    Answer by mumma28 at 10:51 PM on Jun. 17, 2009

  • Buy him the ugliest pair of shoes you can find or better yet some obviously noticeable pair of girl's shoes (hardcore pink and purple) and make him wear those for a week or two. Tell him he wouldn't have to wear them if he hadn't "lost" his other shoes. Tell him you'll get him boys shoes if he behaves for a certain amount of time.

    If he starts acting up and conveniently "loses" his shoes again...out come the pink and purple ones.


    Answer by Anonymous at 9:39 PM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • Are you sure that the lost items were not stolen?
    There are many therapists who work with people who have ADD/ADHD to teach them not just coping skills, but how to use ADD/ADHD as an advantage in their lives. Thom Hartmann has written extensively on this topic; you should be able to find his books art your local library, there is lots of information at his website: You may also want to explore how foods affect behavior, either from the Feingold Organization ( or another source. We eat a "clean" diet; no processed foods, no chemical additives, no meat, very little dairy
    My daughter's attention issues were helped dramatically by fish oil supplements (though we have since switched her to hemp oil). It is important to use a good brand, like Nordic Naturals; it takes about 8 weeks to become effective
    Good luck, and make sure he always wears his helmet!.

    Answer by rkoloms at 10:43 AM on Jun. 19, 2009

  • I will dare to be diffrent here.
    My son is 5 and has beed dign. in Sept of last year as ADHD/ODD His behavior sounded very similar to your story. His preschool had taken away recess, all his points, and asked if they could paddel because he hit 3 difrent children all in one day. ;( I knew it was getting close to needing to be tested for, it runs in the family, but most Dr. won't until K-5. We have added a better diet, Omega-3 vit. and Adderall XR. In less than a year, my son has "learned" to handel his impules and aggression. I think the meds. allowed him to calm down enough to use the right reaction. NO I don't have a ZOMMBIE like most want to think of medication for ADHD. I now get to enjoy watching my son play and smile instead of us fighting and yelling or punishing all day long.
    So, I suggest fixing his meds. up the does, change to a diffrent one, ect. Your Dr. should be able to help you with this. (cont.)

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:38 PM on Jun. 19, 2009

  • (cont) No reason you should still feel this way or he should be so out of control if the ADHD is being addressed. GL

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:41 PM on Jun. 19, 2009

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