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Is this right?((Vent))

My husband and I have been married for 5 years and we have 4 children together. Aiden and Evan (3), Leah (18 months) and Olivia (6 months). Plus I am 16 weeks pregnant with triplets. Well, we moved from Annapolis to Buffalo (a branch off of his law firm) and then from Buffalo to Chicago, 5 months ago. He got a change to pick where he wanted to move to next and he knows that I hate Chicago and wanted to move closer to my mom in Maryland...where does he pick? New Jersey! ..nnot too far. Another thing: he told me that "I won't be around a lot. I will be getting this firm up and running, so basically you will be running this place on your own". So, my hormonal self said "Are you kidding me? There will be 7 of them and 1 of me! If you think that I am going to just play happy housewife while you go play Wii at the office? F*** you, Jon." I told him that I am moving to Annapolis, without him and that my lawyer will call his lawyer.

Answer Question
 
katfranz111

Asked by katfranz111 at 10:30 AM on Jun. 18, 2009 in Relationships

Level 4 (48 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • Wow, I do believe you should have some say in where you move. With that many kids you can sart your own reality T.V. show. Good Luck!
    writeon

    Answer by writeon at 10:35 AM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • You need a support system in place. Your husband needs a vasectomy. Have you thought about hiring a nanny?
    motherofhope98

    Answer by motherofhope98 at 10:36 AM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • That is something that the two of you should have decided together..

    I live in NJ....it is very exspensive to live here and the taxes are very high..

    Too many people in such a small state..

    Good Luck....
    Dannee

    Answer by Dannee at 10:37 AM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • Go for it sounds good to me..Those are his kids too, he can't just expect you to handle it all.
    He better snap out of it.
    Butterfly1108

    Answer by Butterfly1108 at 10:39 AM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • Well, I think you shouldn't have jumped straight to lawyers, but I don't think you were completely wrong either. 4 kids is a lot to handle, 7 is even worse. Now, I get that he would definitely be busy trying to get a new office up and running, but why didn't he offer to help you get a nanny or a sitter or something to help you? Honestly, it kind of sounds to me like you guys just aren't communicating very well right now. Maybe you guys should try to calm down and sit down and discuss this again. Maybe even sit with a counselor or some kind of mediater to help you guys try to stay calm throughout the discussion. You'll be even more stressed if your marriage ends. I'd try to fix things first. Good luck!
    tropicalmama

    Answer by tropicalmama at 10:41 AM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • First, I commend you in being able to handle the kids. My 2 drive me crazy. lol

    He doesn't see the need in getting you any help? It almost sounds like you're living out of boxes. By the time you unpack your packing up again. Why can't there by a compromise and he do the travelling without you and the kids? You can stay in Maryland and when he finishes with getting the offices set up, he has a "home" to come back to.
    Danni143

    Answer by Danni143 at 10:43 AM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • I'd get into counseling now. Without him. Tell him you're doing that and then he has to go in with you. If he refuses when the time comes after you've gotten counselling for yourself then at that point, tell him by and he can now support two separate households and seven children, three newborns and an infant all till their 18 year old and through college. You'd get alimony plus child support. Set it in motion and prove to him you mean business. He thinks you're bluffing. Don't let his ego ruin your children's lives and yours.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:49 AM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • Is this a real question or a troll?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:01 PM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • Wow. Sounds like you might wanna see a marriage counselor or something. You and I both know that you don't want to raise 7 kids by yourself and I'm sure he doesn't want you too, either. I think you need to sit down after the kids have gone to bed, and lay your cards down on the table. Be adults and make sure that this move is best for your children. Be strong momma.

    And anon 12:01, seriously? Go back to bed.
    samantham76

    Answer by samantham76 at 12:06 PM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • Has he thought about getting an apartment in NJ and buying a house in Annapolis. Maybe he could spent 1 week and month at the main office and every weekend at home while he bounces around setting up new office every six months. This is do-able. But you two are going to have to start communicating better. Good luck honey!

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:14 PM on Jun. 18, 2009

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