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help! i caught my 14 year old son.

He was watching porn and masturbating! i dont know what to say to him, of course he already knows about sex and we have talked about it before. worst of all it was my husbands porn video.

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LucyG.

Asked by LucyG. at 7:28 PM on Jun. 18, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • ...So? He's a 14 year old boy. He's going to find daddy's porn stash and masturbate. What's the problem?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:30 PM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • You, nothing... let your husband talk to him about it. He will be able to talk to him about it better, its not a moms place.
    HolliBerry21

    Answer by HolliBerry21 at 7:32 PM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • Not seeing the problem here. It's normal behavior. There are many worse things he could be doing at 14.

    Masturbation is sex with someone you love, at least.
    Ginger0104

    Answer by Ginger0104 at 7:32 PM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • Hahaha oh no. Well I mean its completely normal for him to be doing that so I don't think I would say anything at all. Just go about your lives like it never happened. At least that's what I would do. Poor thing haha he's probably embarassed, as you probably are!
    Ash9724

    Answer by Ash9724 at 7:32 PM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • All I can say is his dad needs to have a talk with him about making SURE he has complete privacy next time. (As for the porn, dad has a hot-potato discussion, doesn't he?)

    In other words, just don't say anything to your son. Let dad do the talking.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:33 PM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • For his age it is very normal, I dont care for porn but guys do..As far as the masterbation thatis so normal, he has probably been doing it for years now but you just caught him. He needs to know the masterbation part is not wrong but he needs to understand that girls are not like what he sees on tv and to learn to respect them and not treat them like sex objects and toys. Have dad talk to him if you cant but he needs to know you still love him. He also and you also need to learn privacy, knock before entering a closed door and he needs to lock the door behing him. I know its a shock mom, just breath
    midnightmoma

    Answer by midnightmoma at 7:39 PM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • Who cares, leave him alone and pretend like it never happened. He will like that a lot better,
    MammaBella

    Answer by MammaBella at 7:52 PM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • I wouldn't say anything. Just act like it never happened. I bet he's praying that you go on like normal without "sitting him down and having a discussion". That would only add to the embarrasment.
    riceswife

    Answer by riceswife at 8:20 PM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • Nothing, It is normal for a 14 yr old to masturbate. Just tell him that he needs to do so in private, like his bedroom or bathroom with the door closed and if possible, locked. Let him be and do NOT make a big deal out of it.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 11:04 PM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • its totally normal for a 14 year old to find daddy's porn and masturbate with, however you or your husband should deff have a talk with him. I was 13 I believe when I found my parents porno stash and watched it all and I had a VERY false since of what sex and how you behave/treat people for years. because of what I saw I thought those acts (being rude, pushy, ejaculating on women) things of that nature were natural and Ok. It took me years to have a good understanding on what a healthy happy and loving sex life was. He is gonna masturbate, and watch those videos just make sure you educate him on how that's NOT how its done in the real world, and ejaculating on women, hitting them, being pushy or using those dirty words real women in the real world find demeaning, dirty, and make them feel ashamed. that way he doesn't have such a false sense of sexuality!

    judith_visco

    Answer by judith_visco at 11:58 AM on Jun. 20, 2009

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