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Why is it some women feel that men of their race should only be with other women of the same race?

I am white and my husband is Hispanic. We have been together for five years now. When we were dating his family was ok with it, but didn't bother to get to know me well. When DH told them we were getting married his mother was so upset. She didn't want her son marrying a white woman. She even tried to guilt trip him by telling him she wanted grandchildren who looked like her and would carry on their heritage and that she raised him to marry a good Mexican woman. They have never been nice to me and have never accepted me as part of the family. His sisters have lectured me saying that I have taken a good Mexican man away from Mexican women. My husband's aunt recently told me that his family doesn't take me seriously because they believe one day he get his act together and leave me for a Hispanic woman. Then they won't have to deal with me ever again. They don't even refer to our kids by their names, they call them the white kids

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Asked by aprilmommy123 at 11:04 PM on Jun. 18, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (22)
  • Now a good friend of mine is going through something similar. She is half Asian, half French-Canadian and her boyfriend is black. His family doesn't approve and has told him he needs to settle down with a good black woman. That he is just going through a "white" phase right now and shouldn't get serious with my friend (or any other woman) until he is over this phase.

    Answer by aprilmommy123 at 11:06 PM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • Wow! That is rough... I can't even imagine how hard it is for you to just deal with them, let alone be civil to them.


    Answer by VeronicaLee at 11:08 PM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • cause race should stay with race.. so sick of interbreeding.. pretty soon wont be any single color races and i will have to fight more mixed breed mutts for jobs!

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:14 PM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • cause ppl are full of it

    Answer by preggoinmn at 11:15 PM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • your white so you dont understand u got the whole world as your oyster. u dont know what its like growin up and seeing all the men in your neighborhood u know being arrested or a daddy by 15 or doin drugs and always drunk. they are up to no good and when there is a good man than a white girl takes him. there aint no one left for us woman lookn for a good man. its like the men dont see us as good enough for them since they has risen out of the hood.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:28 PM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • anon.. there isnt no good black man

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:30 PM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • Alot of ignorance coming from anon :28 and :30

    anon :28 I am white so I don't understand? What makes you think I grew up privileged and in a good neighborhood? Just because my parents were white doesn't mean we were rich. When you limit yourself to only date or marry one race you are shutting out a whole world of people. What makes you think your soul mate was born with the same color of skin as you? You are the one who is holding yourself back by refusing to consider a man of another race.

    Maybe you should focus inward and make yourself into a good woman that a good man (ANY good man) would want to marry.


    Answer by aprilmommy123 at 11:35 PM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • can't see the world changing any time soon

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:45 PM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • I hate racism. If I was still single I'd be looking for a nice muscular RastaMan with long dreads (I am CA)! Okay, just kidding, but I think there are wonderful, attractive men of every race and it doesn't matter in the least.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:58 PM on Jun. 18, 2009

  • What is this, national ignorance day? I'm not referring to you OP, just some of these answers. There was another question about race and I couldn't believe the answers. Some races are proud of their heritage (as they should be) but believe that it can't be carried on if their child marries outside of their race. Try not to let it get you down. Just think if it wasn't for his parents you wouldn't have your husband and your kids. Don't stoop to her level. She'll come around eventually when she realizes he isn't leaving you. Sadly by then they will have missed precious time with your kids.

    Answer by sadira29 at 12:03 AM on Jun. 19, 2009

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