Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Im moving on....

Ive been with my Dh for 9yrs married 3 we have grown apart. Ive tried fixing things but ive realized i can't do it alone. The only reaso ive hung in this long is because we have three kid's, Im filing for divorce but im so scared ive never been on my own ive always been a SAHM never had a job. But i dont know what my rights are when it comes to a divorce, Will i get my vehicle and what about custody of my kids, A old friend recently got in touch with me and told me if i needed him he would be here for me which i thought was really nice since we havent seen each other in 10 yrs well today he called and checked on me and told me after my divorce was final he wanted to see Where "we" went as a couple anyone else go through anything like this, i feel lost..

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 8:46 PM on Jun. 21, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (4)
  • Sorry, I have never been through it. But I will say you might not want to jump into a relationship too fast. You need time to get you and your kids settled to the new way of things. Just stay casual friends for now. You should get custody of your kids, unless your husband can prove you unfit. You will get child support for the kids, and you MAY get alimony for a bit. I am not certain about the alimony, but it is there for wives like you have stayed home and cared for the kids, so they figure you need time to get on your feet. I hope everything goes ok. Good luck.

    Answer by TeriMelisa at 9:03 PM on Jun. 21, 2009

  • Sounds to me like your giving up and moving onto "greener pastures". If marriage of easy, it wouldn't be worth it. Maybe you should try harder, all marriages go thru stages like that.

    Answer by SoKamele at 9:12 PM on Jun. 21, 2009

  • ive never been through anything like that. but i cant tell you,your a woman! your strong and you dont need a man to make you feel safe. so you were a stay at home mom...things change. you can do it! and as far as your friend,thats nice but you need to take care of you first! you have to get your life pieced together. you cant take care of another person if you cant take care of yourself and you have to think about how your kids would feel about that too! its jus too much at once. get your life in order first! and you can do it! ill be praying for you! and i wish you the best

    Answer by kuuipo317 at 9:15 PM on Jun. 21, 2009

  • I don't know what to say...have you talked to your husband about this? How motivated are you by the re-entry of this man from your past into your life? I think you should sort through all of this and figure out what you are really doing. It is never easy. There are no rules about what happens to your car.....visitation, custody....child support, getting a job to support yourself .... these are all issues you will have to face. It will be a hard road and not simple! How much will your husband fight you? Is he going to be shocked by this?

    Answer by BJoan at 10:07 AM on Jun. 22, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.