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Does your spouse seem to fail at helping with the baby on purpose??

maybe its my exhaustion speaking but whenever I ask husb to help out he seems to make a small fussiness worse and I always end up taking over..what in the world??

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:05 PM on Jun. 21, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

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Answers (9)
  • Maybe he is afraid of screwing up or hurting the baby?Men tend to shy away from things they don't feel comfortable with (I am not excusing it by any means).Have you ever left him alone with the baby?If you haven't, or if you are afraid to-maybe leave him with the baby and someone you trust to keep an eye on both of them.So he has help if he absolutely needs it, but he won't have you to run to and take over.Or go on a short trip to the store and see how he handles it.My experience is that you may have to force them in the beginning, but as they feel more comfortable and confident they will do it with less hesitation.And maybe give him an "Atta boy" and a slap on the butt telling him he did a good job.And as soon as you can leave him for a bit - book a day at the spa or go out and do something for you!!!That way when he does something aggravating again you won't be AS tempted to strangle him,lol.You will be too relaxed! GL!
    Kiiimmm

    Answer by Kiiimmm at 12:48 AM on Jun. 22, 2009

  • yes
    MamaRoberts

    Answer by MamaRoberts at 10:07 PM on Jun. 21, 2009

  • don't take over or else he wil just keep doing that cuz he knows you will take over for him
    looovemybabies

    Answer by looovemybabies at 10:10 PM on Jun. 21, 2009

  • Normal male behavior, some dads are really good with babies but they have to learn, as babies men just dont know what to do with them, they are scared, lost, confused etc. I can tell you tho, once the baby gets older, walking and talking and playing, thats when most dads really come around, until the teenage years UGH!!!! So yes, I know what you mean. Be patient with dad and help him become more comfortable with everything LOL.
    midnightmoma

    Answer by midnightmoma at 10:10 PM on Jun. 21, 2009

  • always! I think its just a male thing
    leann74016

    Answer by leann74016 at 10:10 PM on Jun. 21, 2009

  • blah! I hate it! I end up not getting any rest at all, the whole point was so I could rest or do something, but its like I set myself up for disaster lol
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:12 PM on Jun. 21, 2009

  • Its got to be a male thing. My SO just dosent know how to play w/ our DD or what to do hes pretty clueless it seems. Shes 18 mo now though & as time goes on & as there are more discussions/arguments (sometimes) about these things hes slowly coming around & becoming better at just jumping in to help me when its needed.
    Mel30248

    Answer by Mel30248 at 10:13 PM on Jun. 21, 2009

  • not with important things like feeding or changing or giving her a bath but with getting her dressed he has a hard time because he feels like he'll break her if he puts the shirt over her head and it's not extremely gentle lol. i told him it won't hurt to stretch the shirt or put it over her face first then over the back of her head but he gets frustrated because he doesn't want to hurt her.
    pringles_697

    Answer by pringles_697 at 10:34 PM on Jun. 21, 2009

  • Haha i feel you! it's like they cant be bothered even learning. Think its patience with my dh and oh cos he works he doesn't have to do anything around the house ... yeah right!!! :( hang in there.... hopefully it gets better when the babies get older. Hope so

    Or we may just have to accept that the men we married are not who we thought they would be as parents but still wonderful providers.
    mummylovebaby

    Answer by mummylovebaby at 10:36 PM on Jun. 21, 2009