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As a custodial parent, would you switch the living arrangements with the non custodial parent for a week?

My daughter has really become a handful. My ex thinks I am exaggeratting since she is never that way at Dad's. Well, Dad only has him for 24 hours at a time, and Dad schedules all of his appointments during that time and Daughter has baseball games every week on that night. I think that it would help me get a bit a of a break and they say absence makes the heart grow fonder. I think, that since Daughter doesn't really like it at Dad's(she thinks its boring), she might realize how good she has it here. And I think that it will give Dad some perspective on how much of a hellion our child can actually be. In the 24 hours a week, after the weekly therapist visit, sleep, and baseball, Dad and Daughter only get about 11 hours together. I am hoping, if nothing else, this could prove to be a real bonding experience for the two of them. I am just not sure that I could handle that long away from her. In this situation, would you do it?


Asked by Anonymous at 12:15 AM on Jun. 22, 2009 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (5)
  • It may give him some perspective on what you are dealing with. To a PP - Dad probably has 24/hours a week because a lot of courts think that is fine for a NCP. It may have nothing to do with Dad as a person and a father.

    I think for your DD, it would be good for her to live with her dad week on, week off over the summer. It would also give you a break. Sure, you will miss her, and I get that. But you have to tell yourself that you are trying to not only get Dad on board w/ parenting a tough kid, you are teaching DD that she needs to learn to behave better. And that life will suck with both parents on her ass until she does.

    However, Dad scheduling all his shit the one day he has DD - would he even be on board with this idea? And if so, get something in writing that this is only temp and an attempt to better parent vs a change in custody.

    Answer by LiliM at 9:44 AM on Jun. 22, 2009

  • I would love too.. I have a 4 year old and a 2 year old. He thinks it is so easy taking care of them and i am so tired by days end I usually just fall asleep when they do. I am 24 years old and it wears me out. He is 28 I would love to see him chasing after them for a week..


    Answer by TaterNJo0sMommy at 12:19 AM on Jun. 22, 2009

  • No. you didn't say how old daughter is, guessing preteen/teen? Dad has her 24/hrs per week for a reason, I think you should wait for her to turn 18 and then have her go over for a week, maybe longer.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:28 AM on Jun. 22, 2009

  • If they are both up for it, why not.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:47 AM on Jun. 22, 2009

  • OP here

    Dad has her 24hrs/pr week because when we separated, he didn't have anywhere to stay, so it was like a year and a half before he was able to attempt to get any kind of custody. He still came over to our house frequently to visit her. But the courts would have never given him any kind of custody while he was staying with his brother, sister in law and their 5 kids. I would take her there once a week for a few hours to visit with him, and he would come over to our house at least 3 times a week outside of that. He was involved, but the judge didn't think he needed any more time. He is in therapy to deal with some issues that arose well before he and I even started dating. He has some real image issues, and for as long as I can remember, he has always had his appointments that day. I don't know that he has ever considered getting it changed since it is so routine for him. Thanks ladies, for your opinions.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:22 PM on Jun. 22, 2009