Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Question for those who spank

Please only answer this if you agree with spanking, I'm not looking for a debate. My twins are 3yo. Yesterday my MIL gave me a book called "Mothers Almanac" that she said was the best she ever read on raising kids. I really like the book. It even had a very specific section on "the dark side" of discipline (spanking).

My question is, what do you think of the advice in this book for 3-6 year olds? If you followed this path, and did it work for you? What, if anything, did you do differently? The book was written in 1975, and I'm wondering if moms with practical experince still agree or have other ideas.

"Only spank a pre-Three if he runs into the street or touches the power tools. A Three to Six may need to be spanked occasionally, with a "pantsdowner" given for extremely naughty behavior. Use your bare hand, not a hair brush or a wooden spoon, so you can gauge your force.

Please answer honestly! Anonymous is fine!

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:05 PM on Jun. 22, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (14)
  • Funny I've never even read this book, but that's how I've handle spanking. I don't do it very much, because I don't want it to lose it's effectiveness and I ONLY spank if my kids were playing in the outlets or something that would hurt them! I wanted them to remember it! It worked very well for me! For the record I have only used spankings about a handful of times on each child.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:09 PM on Jun. 22, 2009

  • For the younger kids I give them a smack on the hand or a quick smack on the padded diaper butt, but the older kids get it on the clothed butt. I dont barebottom spank, and I dont do it often, but when the kids are doing things they absolutely know they shouldnt be doing and do it they will get a pretty good spank on the bottom
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:10 PM on Jun. 22, 2009

  • i only spank occasionally and when the situation calls for it. and not too hard.
    rhiannon728

    Answer by rhiannon728 at 8:13 PM on Jun. 22, 2009

  • I never do a bare bottom spank. I only spank for things I absolutely won't put up with or safety... running into the street, lying, intentionally doing something bad (like breaking a window), etc. I never spank when I'm angry. I calm down first. I almost always spank with a wooden spoon. I don't want them to be scared of my hands and I want them to know that's what's going to happen. If you spank with your hands, they never know when they'll be spanked and live in more fear. This is just my personal belief.

    Since I don't spank when I'm angry, I always smack myself on the leg with the spoon prior to spanking them. This way, each time, I can gauge it so I don't spank too hard.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:16 PM on Jun. 22, 2009

  • I never do a bare bottom spank and I only do it for major things...ie: running towards the street, grabbing a knife (well, trying to anyway), doing something that could severely injure self/others. On occasion, back talking will get a tap on the cheek with the index finger. It's rare that I actually have to resort to spanking, though. I think the book has some good ideas, except for the pants down one.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:22 PM on Jun. 22, 2009

  • Didn't you post this before?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:25 PM on Jun. 22, 2009

  • Well, it seems that was how I was raised!! My parents must have read that!

    I believe in spanking. However, it is never okay to pull a child's pants down and spank a bare bottom. And it is never okay to use any object other than your hand.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:38 PM on Jun. 22, 2009

  • I did post this before, but it seemed like it only went the 3-4 group. I was hoping for a broader response. It seemed like for most of the 3-4's there was agreement and it didn't seem outdated, although one person was against spanking in general and everything here in particular. I was just curious whether what is described here was how most people handled it. I haven't really done any of the pants down spankings and I don't use anything other than my hand, but I have tended to put up with things rather than discipline very strictly.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:59 PM on Jun. 22, 2009

  • There are times like tonight,my granddaughter decided she wanted to throw a tantrum, she was actually opening the hot oven, I paniced and said no real loud,I took her out the kitchen,she came back to the oven again,once again I took her out the kitchen,she came screaming and touched the oven again,yes,I popped her hands,and yes she really screamed,but,she didn't touch the oven. I felted so bad,but,a little pop is better than a burn.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:55 PM on Jun. 22, 2009

  • Spanking should never be the first form of discipline (at least not for me) and should only be used in extreem cases and when you have tried every other form and it hasn't worked. No bare bottoms and no objects, only the hand, I feel that once an object is used it steps over the line and borders (not definte) on abusive. I have spanked almost, but not all, of mine at some point and find that after one or two swats, just the threat of a spanling is all it takes.
    luckysevenwow

    Answer by luckysevenwow at 9:59 PM on Jun. 22, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.