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Having more children

My husband and I have a beautiful 2 month old little girl and we love being parents and we definitley want more children,but my husband doesnt seem to want to wait as long as I do to have another.I want to wait until shes potty trained and we've really has time to enjoy her before we have another,like when shes 3.He wants to start right away and I totally oppose and I've expressed this and he doesn't seem to listen.He lost his job a few months ago and we moved in with his parents and were still living with him and he has a job making 7.05 and I make the same and were barely scraping by.He refuses to use condoms and I have insurance and want to be put back on birth control until were really ready and he doesnt seem to want me to.I'm not sure what to d0,but I do know that I don't want to bring another child into the world that we can't provide for.Any advice for me?

Answer Question

Asked by alaina_20 at 9:03 PM on Jun. 22, 2009 in Relationships

Level 7 (151 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • go on birth control.. no offense if you know you cannot afford a child your doing more harm bringing a kid that you cannot afford and not to be mean ur costing more from PA and wic when fully knowing u cant afford a second.. not to be mean.. that and enjoy ur child.. get to bond with them. and its ur body and ur right to get birth control and he will just have to come around

    Answer by preggoinmn at 9:05 PM on Jun. 22, 2009

  • Until he is able to carry that child in his belly, you really have the say whether or not to get pregnant. Go get the pill or an IUD. I have two that are 18 months apart and it is hard. I am a stay at home mom and it is hard, I can not imagine working and having two so small.

    Answer by Nathskitten at 9:06 PM on Jun. 22, 2009

  • He's certainly not thinking practically. How does one justify bringing another child into the world when he can't provide for the one he has? (not bashing) He's probably caught up in the joy of the new baby. Tell him that you will discuss this again next year and see how things are financially then. Waiting a year is a reasonable compromise imo.

    Answer by admckenzie at 9:19 PM on Jun. 22, 2009

  • I think you are being very practical in waiting. I think your hubs is being unrealistic in trying to pressure you to have a 2nd baby, especially if you are living with his parents and finances are tight. Does he not realize how expensive a baby is? Let alone having a 2nd baby? I think he needs to stop and think and enjoy this child for a while. I think it would be a good idea for you to see your ob/gyn and get put on some form of birth control- that way you won't have any 'surprises' or 'accidents'. Good luck.

    Answer by MizLee at 9:23 PM on Jun. 22, 2009

  • Stick to your guns. It's sweet that he's so into being a daddy, but he's not thinking clearly. His mind is clouded by new parent euphoria. He'll come to his senses soon enough. You are right, you shouldn't have another until you are ready emotionally, physically, mentally, and financially.


    "A study in the February 25,1999, New England Journal of Medicine reported a higher incidence of low birthweight and prematurity among babies conceived within six months of a previous birth, compared to those conceived 18 to 23 months following the last baby. It makes good sense for a woman to let her body recover and replenish lost nutrients after having a baby."

    Answer by beckcorc at 9:43 PM on Jun. 22, 2009

  • If you aren't financially or emotionally ready for another one and he is refusing to wear condoms don't have sex with him.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:47 PM on Jun. 22, 2009

  • tell him it takes two years fro a womans body to recover from a pregnancy you put your health and the health of your future baby at risk by concieving to close together and if need be shut down the love shack if he wont be responsible someone has to be

    Answer by katiekruschke at 10:18 PM on Jun. 22, 2009

  • wAIT & GET ON BIRTH CONTROL it's all happy & good until you relize formula, diapers, clothes, etc..... & yo start fighting & wait until your in your own place this is a question you knew the answer to just needed validation, wairt wait wait

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:19 AM on Jun. 23, 2009

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