Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Are you a military wife??? I feel like one!!

I FEEL like one! My Fiance is a traveling photographer and its gone for months at a time without me seeing him. I wouldnt agree to it normally but he gets paid really well. Hes on tour with the Jonas Brothers right now. He is gone for 3 more months. How do you military moms do it??
I have 4 month old twins, and to get through the day, i think "at least its not triplets" or "at least hes not in the military" lol.

 
dennysgirl07

Asked by dennysgirl07 at 11:42 PM on Jun. 22, 2009 in Just for Fun

Level 1 (0 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • Well, i"ve been "lucky" compared to a lot of military wives. My husband's job (so far) has been a M-F 7-4 type job for the most part. He has deployed once in 12 years. That will soon change though. He does go on TDY's for a few days to a few weeks at a time. There's a real possibility of him having a year long deployment coming up. BUT the time will pass quicker for me because I don't have time to sit around feeling sorry for myself. I have 3 kids ages 12,10, and 5. I've done things alone before. I would also be moving our whole family to our next base if he does end up deploying. I know when my hubby deployed, we kept busy because the kids had all their activities, i still had to keep the house clean, the kids had friends over all the time, I spent quite a few long nights at my friends house whose husband was also deployed, talking til 5am lol. I took the kids out to do more things during the day, and chatted w/him online.
    AprilDJC

    Answer by AprilDJC at 11:51 PM on Jun. 22, 2009

  • wow touring with the jonas brothers vs fighting a war and being shot at everyday... quite a comparison...
    but to answer the ? i stay busy by playdates, church, house stuff, ect makes the days go faster the more you do.
    Soniam301

    Answer by Soniam301 at 11:57 PM on Jun. 22, 2009

  • I am an army wife, and sometimes I think the distance is the least of our worries. Yes it is extremely difficult to be alone and I cannot imagine how hard it is for you with two little ones so young. Take comfort in the fact that you can text him and talk to him on a daily basis. Most military spouses don't have this luxury. You go into a marriage knowing that when you marry anyone in the military. You are going to have to make important decisions by yourself, celebrate birthdays, anniversaries, child birth, and entire pregnancies alone. It is just the nature of our relationships. We commit to it, and know how important our role is to the family. The unit cannot be sustained if we aren't strong.
    2-1CavWife

    Answer by 2-1CavWife at 11:58 PM on Jun. 22, 2009

  • i dont mean it that way!!
    Just how hes gone for forever and traveling all the time. Its nothing like them putting their life in danger, god!!!
    dennysgirl07

    Answer by dennysgirl07 at 12:19 AM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • I am an armywife and for me it just depends on the type of person you are. I have friends that could never be a military wife much less the wife of anyone that travels. They need their husbands around to make every single decision.

    I am sorry that someone was rude to you. I attend church also (very religious), but I wouldn't give a rude answer to someone and then say I was going to church to keep busy. I personally am not offended that your soon to be hubby is gone being a photographer and mine deployed to Iraq. Actually, mine was injured in Iraq and I am still not offended that you compared the two. I understand you just meant jobs in general that keep your husband out of the house. You can compare my hubby to yours if you want. They both provide for their family away from the house and I don't think mine is any better than yours. I am also personally jealous of the photography thing. I am huge into photography.
    VintageWife

    Answer by VintageWife at 12:27 AM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • Thank you Vintagewife :)
    i really appreciate your answer and openmindedness!
    You seem like an amazing woman
    dennysgirl07

    Answer by dennysgirl07 at 12:39 AM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • first off I am not offended that the two jobs were compared. It is just when you say you "feel" like a military wife it is a totally different thing. Your SO is touring with the Jonas Brothers (which by the way I think is way better then a tour in Iraq) SO the feelings are completely different. And To the extremely "religious" person. How about you quit judging me. Kinda like pot meet kettle. You have no idea what I am going through right now. How about you know a little back ground before judging me.
    Yes now reading my answer was kinda rude but sorry to say it I would much rather have my husband staying in a hotel every night then in a war zone and having my son ask if he is going to die like his dad did. So I know first hand the realities of this war and I am sorry but I just cant see a relation in the two jobs.
    Soniam301

    Answer by Soniam301 at 1:19 AM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • I don't know your situation, you are right. I just feel bad for civilian wives because I know so many military wives that get angry and go off on the poor ladies because their husbands aren't in the same situation.

    Please don't take offense in what I said. I guess I just felt the need to stand up for her because when I read what she said, I knew there would be someone that would tell her its not the same thing. Having your hubby away from you and the kids is the same no matter where they are. We military wives just have to worry more about their safety.

    My apologies,

    *the pot*

    :)
    VintageWife

    Answer by VintageWife at 2:16 AM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • Dennysgirl - Funny this is the second time I have answered to one of your posts... I am a military wife, and my husband just deployed last month. It has been really rocky for me, my son just turned 6 months old, I am battling cancer, I am trying to maintain my identity while also keep the rest of my life together, and I just plain miss him like crazy. But who am I to judge how anyone else feels about someone they miss? Your fiance sounds like he has a pretty sweet gig! I hope you at least get to talk to him every now and again... Though I don't get to talk to my husband on the phone, I do get to email him as much as I want, and he emails back almost every other day. That really helps me pass the time. Even though most of the emails are just a few words, I am smiling for hours!!!
    vdecker

    Answer by vdecker at 2:44 AM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • As far as how to pass the time without him - throw yourself into the things that you love to do alone even when he is home. I have noticed that when I try to do things that we love to do together I tend to get unmotivated and yes, I admit it, even a little weepy... So remember the things that you love(d) to do by yourself, and fall in love with them all over again.

    For me it was/is sewing and designing wedding gowns, painting, and playing volleyball. I have found some girlfriends who are also without their husbands right now and we have dinner nights at each other's houses and we have game nights. I always have the next thing to look forward to written in big letters on my calendar so that I am not focused at all the empty spaces between now and when he comes home.
    vdecker

    Answer by vdecker at 2:48 AM on Jun. 23, 2009

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN