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So confused now & stuck in a thought loop.

Pregnancy hormones aren't helping me any, but this conundrum is causing me insomnia.

I've been with the same guy for 3 years, good friends for 10 before that. we talked off and on for the past 2 years about getting married, but he always came up with a reason why we should wait another year. Well tonight before bed I asked him to remind me of why we were waiting, because I really can't remember. He replied "well let's get married the week of this 4th of July, I have Friday off". Now I'm not sure if I want to get married on such short notice, but then I think "if I don't jump on this it may never happen, but then again do I want to marry some one wishy washy about spending the rest of our lives together?". Plus I am kinda worried that he feels pressured into it because we are on our 2nd kid.

IDK, some one give me a shove so maybe I can get off this and get some sleep.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:56 AM on Jun. 23, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (5)
  • if your worried about having a big wedding I say get married and then have the big one later on. If you have two kids and have been together that long then it seems like it would be right to get married and he wouldnt have said it if he didnt mean it. If you love him and he loves you I say jump on it, its romantic doing the big surprise!!
    Mikayla_lynn

    Answer by Mikayla_lynn at 3:59 AM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • talk to him! The most important thing in any relationship is communication!!! Ask him if you could meet in the middle and make it a few months out, if he is really serious about this... what does marriage mean to you anyway? Will it really change anything between the two of you? I wouldnt force marriage on anyone... my DH and I were together for 6 years before we got married and we also had two kids... I would talk more openly to him about it... you both need to be happy about this... you need to compromise and work together... good luck!
    sxc_mom_of2

    Answer by sxc_mom_of2 at 4:21 AM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • Wait. He might not really mean it right even though he thinks he does.
    smarshy

    Answer by smarshy at 9:03 AM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • I think you should tell him this.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:10 AM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • Well, if you have two kids together anyway I don't see that there is any real risk in going ahead and actually getting married.....It seems you two are bound by reality if not a piece of paper! I think you should just talk to him about it...what were you waiting for? Is there any real reason to wait? Is there any reason to rush? What would you be comfortable with....would you rather have a bit of time to plan something, or are you okay with a spur of the moment kind of thing? Talk to him!
    BJoan

    Answer by BJoan at 10:12 AM on Jun. 23, 2009

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