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Is this normal?

Every since my boyfriend and I broke up, and since my divorce, I find myself starting to be SO sick of men. I mean yes I'm attracted to them, but I feel like they are all the same, none of them know how to treat a woman right. I'm so frustrated and when I see men I just get soooo mad sometimes. Is that normal, I've been through some pretty rough relationships in the past few years so I thought maybe that brought it on, but I'm just not sure anymore, I don't want to be bitter against men, I just want to be treated right, I just want to be happy!

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Asked by Anonymous at 8:37 AM on Jun. 23, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • I felt that way for yrs after my divorce. I think it's pretty normal. You go thru the wringer, you want to avoid it again. I took those yrs (yeah, for me it was yrs) for myself and my kids. Got to know myself, learned what I wanted and what I expected from a man. I'm seeing someone now, my first real relationship in 6 yrs. It was worth it, b/c now I know what I expect from him, and what I won't put up with.

    Just take your time. Eventually, you'll find someone who will make you feel the wya you want to feel, who will treat you the way you want to be treated.

    Answer by tropicalmama at 8:44 AM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • i still feel that way alot of the time. take some time away from them. dont start a relationship. you need time for yourself anyhow right? you dont need a man to make you happy (clearly they dont lol) but eventually mr. right will come along and he will make you feel lik a queen. i got lucky, even though my df makes me mad sometimes, he still treats me right, however, i still feel the same about most men, they r pigs. dont pay them any mind. their pigish-ness is not worth your time or anger.

    Answer by xhellxfirex495 at 8:49 AM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • If it's not normal than I will be abnormal with you. :)

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:54 AM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • Take a break from men...and be patient.

    I have a cousin who was going through the same thing only she was wanting a married man who would always tell her he loved her and he was leaving his wife soon...Never happened.

    But yet she was very picky (nothing wrong with that but she kind of over did it) now she finally settled only bc she wanted a baby and now they are seperated I am sure bc of her. I once told her stop being so picky you are going to end up a lonely old woman.

    But for me in my case I was married (with no kids) then divorced him lived alone for 2 years and meeting jerks like you've mention finally I said to myself I am going to take it slow there is no rush on this and all turned out fine. GL


    Answer by Butterfly1108 at 8:58 AM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • I think as you get older and go through those crappy relationships, you determine just what it is that you will and will not accept from a man. You also get more vocal about it so that when you are dating someone you can flat out say "That (behavior, belief, etc) is a deal breaker for me. Have a nice life." That's the purpose of dating, to find out if they stand up to your core beliefs. If not, simply don't accept them.
    I do understand where you're coming from, though. When I met my DH, I was bitter from a recent break up and NOT looking for someone. So was he. Miraculously, we ended up together in a great marriage. The best thing he said to me was "I'm glad that you had those awful relationships. If not, you wouldn't be who you are today and you wouldn't be MINE!" The person you are meant to be with won't see your unwillingness to put up with crap as a negative attribute, but as something amazingly positive. Good luck!

    Answer by JawgaMom1 at 8:58 AM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • Con't...

    Now happily married with was worth the wait...Take Care!!!

    family carI love being a mom and wife....oh and do alot of praying I believe God sent him to me, I thank him everyday for my family...


    Answer by Butterfly1108 at 9:02 AM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • Maybe just don't focus on men at all for a while....focus on your own self and your own life and your family, job, etc. I am at a point in my life where I really do not NEED a least not "at all cost". When I was younger I thought I needed a man in my life because of all the things attached to it....a home, a family.... Well, I have a home and I have my kids and my life is pretty full and I can only see it getting better. In order for a man to come into my life he would have to be pretty close to "perfect" because I have no reason to settle for less. So, I don't spend a lot of time thinking about men. I may be single forever, but I am okay with that too. I am thinking maybe it would be great to meet a man to retire with.....but, whatever! I just want a happy, full, and satisfying life. A man will have to fit into more unhealthy compromises for me!

    Answer by BJoan at 9:52 AM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • Thanks, all of these have helped me. I do need to focus on myself, I don't have any children, just my stepdaughter from my previous marriage who still comes and stays with me at least twice a week, but I can focus on work and myself and starting over!

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:21 AM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • The fact that your stepdaughter still comes to visit you says a LOT about you as a person. Kids have very good barometers when it comes to goodness. That you are taking the time to be with her is wonderful. You never know, you might be the only bright spot in her life!

    Answer by JawgaMom1 at 7:15 AM on Jun. 24, 2009

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