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My 13 year old thought I was a push over, surprise, surprise>

She has been driving me crazy this year-failing, not coming home after school, but now, it is summer time, lol. I know I sounds crazy but, I refuse to have a young child using drugs, it is not happening, having sex, so this summer she will learn that it is my way or no way-NO SHE IS NOT DOING EITHER, BUT THE PATH SHE IS HEADED TO COULD END UP THAT WAY. We had our first girls day out (she cried), and now we are going to the state fair-the other 2 did very well(I am sure she will cry). I am not buying her anything but the basic essentials, food, clothes (no new summer clothes she will have to do with what she has, AS LONG AS IT FITS), and shelter. I am the mom and hopefully the next school year we won't have summer school, AND WE CAN ENOY OUR SUMMER TOGETHER. WHAT DO YOU THINK?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:11 AM on Jun. 23, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (11)
  • Yeah for Mom!
    kaycee14

    Answer by kaycee14 at 11:19 AM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • Stick to your guns Mama!!! Kids don't need a friend they need a parent..yes someone they can talk too, but they don't have to like your rules. Good to see someone prepared for the battle :) My parents stood up for what they believed in and im so glad. Now that im a mother I wonder how the heck were they so strong???
    ria7

    Answer by ria7 at 11:20 AM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • You go, Mom!
    kamsmw

    Answer by kamsmw at 11:26 AM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • THANK YOU SOMETIMES WE NEED CHEERING, I AM GOING TO BE SO UPSET THIS SUMMER, BUT YOU KNOW WHAT SHE WILL LEARN, LIFE IS NOT EASY, AND WE MAKE OUR OWN PROBLEMS. PEOPLE DON'T MAKE THEM FOR YOU.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:30 AM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • Kudos For MOM!!!! I am with you all the way on this one>>>>the kids these days believe that we owe them our souls so they can be happy...REALITY CHECKS ARE GREAT!!!!
    sonja636

    Answer by sonja636 at 12:50 PM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • I agree with you. I am going through the same thing with my daughter. No, she can't go HANG OUT, at their home nor mine. NO SHE CAN'T DATE. PLEASE and THANK YOU are required. A clean bedroom and home is the routine. And there is grace in saying NO. It helps MY sanity and frustrates her to a greater depth of character. The minutes on her cell phone are MINE!
    Cheeseymelt

    Answer by Cheeseymelt at 12:50 PM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • It is really a hard thing, but stick to it!! My girls (12 & 16) know when I say no and really mean it. My DH thinks I'm a push over but the truth is I'm not and the girls know it. I just say "try me and see." Even their friends know when I'm serious.
    wallmom1

    Answer by wallmom1 at 2:34 PM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • Good for you! I've found with my crew that the best way to head off trouble is to just come down hard on stuff many would just call "small". They won't disrespect me. They will also behave in a way that I would be proud of even when I'm not around bc if they don't then I WILL find out. lol If they disrespect any adult, behave improperly, or some other infraction then they will write apologies to anyone else involved. Reports on what they did wrong or grueling. lol Finding scripture to help them to make better choices is great. My son even homeschooled the last 6wks bc he was having trouble picking appropriate friends (and brought home inappropriate music as a result), so I did it for him.

    The main point is that parenting isn't always fun, but it sure is worth all the trouble. GO MOM!
    mommy9

    Answer by mommy9 at 9:59 PM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • I know what you mean - my daughter goofed off with her friends all through the school year when she was 13, and I had to pay $200 per class for summer school. Grr.

    We've got to stick to our guns, or they just won't take us seriously. :-)
    MinstrelMommy

    Answer by MinstrelMommy at 12:23 AM on Jun. 24, 2009

  • Tough love is the hardest to give, but sometimes they really need it. Good for you! A lot of parents are not strong enough to dole it out!
    salexander

    Answer by salexander at 11:54 AM on Jun. 24, 2009

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