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What to do? What questions would be smart to ask without being offensive?

Soo I just picked my son up from his [home] day care and his day care provider informed me that they just found out that her pregnant daughter has the swine flu! I know her daughter doesn't live with her, in fact I'm not even sure she lives in this city, and I'm pretty sure that she would have mentioned to me and the other parents if she had been in contact with her recently. I think she would know enough not to have contact with her now while she's caring for children. I didn't ask any questions because I was so shocked to hear and I was afraid anything that would come out of my mouth on impulse might come off as offensive. So Im wondering what kind of questions you would ask if you were in this situation? Would you automatically pull your kid out no questions asked? I feel bad enough for her that her PREGNANT daughter is going through this but I think I have a right to be scared for my 11 mo. olds health. What would you do?


Asked by Anonymous at 8:37 PM on Jun. 23, 2009 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • I'd call and ask how her dd is doing and ask if she'll be closing the daycare to go care for her. That gives her the chance to tell you where she lives and opens the conversation for you to hear if she herself was exposed to her dd. Just keep it as a conversation about her and her dd but get as much information as you can. If she doesn't catch on by then, I'd just ask, "so the kids in the daycare are ok then, right?"

    Answer by admckenzie at 8:56 PM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • I would take him straight to the doctor and have him checked out. But yea, it is important to make sure there is no chance that the swine flu could've made it to the daycare.

    Answer by tnm786 at 8:43 PM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • When it comes to your son's health no questions are off limits. You could just ask her if shes seen her daughter, and how shes doing. I would hope if she was in contact with her daughter, she wouldn't go to work. But you never know with people.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:45 PM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • Just call her and ask... "I just want to clarify, were the daycare kids exposed to swine flu? No? Oh, that's a relief. I hope your daughter recovers quickly!"

    And relax. Yes, it's spreading rapidly and it's worldwide - that makes it a pandemic. But it is NOT a strong version of the flu. Most of the people who've had it (including me, my 2 year old, and my hubby) had fairly mild flu symptoms. Frankly, I've had worse COLDS. And I've certainly had worse versions of the flu. If your child has been exposed, have a doctor test him for the flu.

    Answer by kaycee14 at 8:52 PM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • My daughter had H1N1 about a month ago. It is truly no worse than a typical winter virus. Doctors are no longer testing for it, as it is so widespread. They are only prescribing the anti-viral meds for high risk patients, as the risk of serious side effects outweigh the (relatively) mild flu symptons.

    Answer by rkoloms at 9:32 PM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • I agree with Kaycee, being direct will give you the best answers, and her suggestion was tactfully posed. Trying to fish information out of someone when it is regarding your child's health (and just as a technique in general) is inefficient, and unnecessary. If she takes offense to you being polite, but direct then there are other issues that probably need to be addressed... like why you are trusting this person with your child. LOL

    Answer by MamasQuiver at 9:34 PM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • If she had contact with her daughter ask her. Ask her and let her know you are concerned about the health of her daughter and grandchild. Chances are good nothing horrible is going to happen to either the baby or the mother. Most people who have this strain of flu are okay - it is just the very fragile that have had medical problems that so far have had more severe complications. Pregnancy is not a medically fragile state. Like other strains of flu, many women have had the flu or flu like viruses, while pregnant and things worked out. Do ask when the last time she saw her daughter and make your child's doctor aware if you are concerned. Even if he came into contact with the someone who may have had exposure to the virus it doesn't mean that he will get it. Hand washing and good basic comon sense help. Panicing not a help at this point. Just be vigilant and if she has had contact in the last few weeks you may just

    Answer by frogdawg at 9:46 PM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • want to find an alternative sitter.

    Answer by frogdawg at 9:46 PM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • Thank you all very much for your answers! You've made me feel a little better :-) I will be asking her about her daughter tomorrow. At this point I think I'm more worried about her than my son and the other kids. Thanks again!

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:48 PM on Jun. 23, 2009