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parents who don't discipline their child

My husbands best friend has a three year old daughter and they come over to our house maby once a week for dinner or to hang out and i absolutely dread it. The little girl jumps on our furniture hits my 15 month old son, steals his sippy cups and drinks out of them and has even stolen toys. I know that she is three and thats what three year olds do but i think that her parents should at least try and stop her. how do i let them know this without losing it and throwing the girl in timeout myself?

 
yas_marie_87

Asked by yas_marie_87 at 9:26 PM on Jun. 23, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

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Answers (7)
  • I would step in, and say "I'm sorry Johny has had a little cough, and I wouldn't want her to get it" and take the cup, " OH you better get down from there or your Dad is gonna get you, I don't want you to get hurt!" Dad steps in, girl off the couch.

    I have learned, sometimes you have to get a little manipulative with your wording, so that the parents do step in. If push comes to shove, it's your house and your rules, if both the daughter and her parents are not going to be respectful to your home and things, then I would change your play dates to a more public destination ( a park, playground or attraction like the zoo).
    MamaRoberts

    Answer by MamaRoberts at 9:34 PM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • Wow! My daughter is almost 3 and she doesn't do that! I would so embarrased if my child acted that way. More importantly I would be more embarrassed if I didn't do anything about it.
    HaileysMom07180

    Answer by HaileysMom07180 at 9:30 PM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • Ooooh boy, have I ever been there! There's not a good answer to this. I did two things; one, began to avoid them like the plague (all three kids are awful) and two, would explain to the child jumping on the couch that "we don't do that in our home, it's not allowed and my kids get a time out for that behavior. So, when you're here, you cannot break the toys, jump on the couch, take the sippy cup." I would say this in front of the kid and parents. Finally one day it got ugly and I had to have a frank and uncomfortable chat with the Dad telling him that my kids couldn't understand why they couldn't jump on the couch after seeing his kids do it and that I had to deprogram every time his family left and I was getting tired of it. To this day, it is still a problem. Good luck but it'll drive you nuts if you don't do at least something.
    jeanclaudia

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 9:31 PM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • I wouldn't say anything to them..At first..I would just stop inviting them to my house..Then if they said something about why we stopped inviting them over. Then I would tell them about there badly behaved child.

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 9:38 PM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • My best friend has a 2 year old, and I have this problem with him as well. My 8 month old loves playing with other kids, and when her son is around him, he hits with with things, takes his toys, and screams bloody freaking murder if he doesn't get his way! My friend's response is " I dont want to discipline him because I dont want anyone to see me hurt his feelings." WTF? When he's in walmart, he throws things on the ground and throws fits in the floor. I don't know how to approach her about it, but I no longer have playdates with her and her son.
    lynnseyfaye

    Answer by lynnseyfaye at 9:45 PM on Jun. 23, 2009

  • just make up excuses next time they want to go to your house and visit again;] and they should get the point from there...
    kimaam

    Answer by kimaam at 3:41 AM on Jun. 24, 2009

  • It is your house and you cannot let a child run it. If you do not want her doing what she does, then you have to tell the child "No no honey, we do not jump on the funiture, if you hit the baby it will hurt him, you do not want to hurt him" ect. I think it is inconsiderate for the parents not to say anything to the child, if fthey let her do it at home that is their cholce but you should not allow that at someone elses home. Otherwise tell the parents you are uncomfotable with the child jumping on the funiture, you are concerned that she may hurt herself or hurt the baby. If she jumps off something or accidently breaks something and hurts herself then they are going to be looking at you.
    my2kids312

    Answer by my2kids312 at 12:42 PM on Jun. 24, 2009

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