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My husbands talking about going into the army.

He wants to go serve is country and i respect that but our daughters 9 months old hell miss so much. plus weve never really ever been apart. i just dont know what to do. i respect him but frankly this sucks!

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zoeysmommy4

Asked by zoeysmommy4 at 1:40 AM on Jun. 24, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (9)
  • Support him. Its all you can do. But tell him of your fears. You have to communicate with a decision this big.
    MommyLee08

    Answer by MommyLee08 at 1:41 AM on Jun. 24, 2009

  • yea. it does suck. ...but dont get too bumed out too fast. He may not even be able to get into the army. My DH's friend just got released from the Army. They have too many ppl willing to sign up (due to the economy) and are being very picky about who they take. My DH even was told that if things continue he will not be allowed to re-enlist.

    outstandingLove

    Answer by outstandingLove at 1:42 AM on Jun. 24, 2009

  • Lately my DH and I have been talking about it as well, either me or him. Our decission is more so for the money to pay off our school loans, long story about not finishing but we're stuck with the bills and he is in probation with his new job for a whole year and the money isn't coming in until then. So if he can't convince them to give him is commision now one of us is going into the army. It's a great way to make money, take care of the family health wise(health insurance) and serve the country. Tell him, if anything go into the Navy or the Air force, they hardly ever have to go to war and they get paid more. It sounds dumb but if you want him to be out of harms way and around to see your daughter grow, then the Navy or Air force is the best way to go! Good luck and hope it works out great for your family!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:43 AM on Jun. 24, 2009

  • I flat out told my husband no when he started talking about this. He still would if I would give him the go-ahead, but I'm too scared of losing him overseas. I couldn't bear it. I'd rather be poor and have him home every night. I also made it clear when we first got together that I never wanted him to go into the army, though, so that might have something to do with why he's so cool about letting me nay-say.

    This is a decision that you both have to make. If you really can't bear it, then tell him that. The final decision has to be his, of course, but make your point of view clear. This affects your whole family for at least a couple years.
    Ati_13

    Answer by Ati_13 at 1:44 AM on Jun. 24, 2009

  • My brother is in the Army and just re-enlisted and from what he's said to me is that they really need people. There is a requirement on weight and of course the ASVAB test then boot camp and he has to have a GED or high school diploma, but I'm sure he knows that. But like someone else said the Navy pays great and so does the Air Force, but they have higher standards but honestly it's a great way for him to take care of you and your daughter.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:46 AM on Jun. 24, 2009

  • I would not join the Air Force if you want to keep him out of war. ...Almost every base in Iraq that the Army stays at is an Air Force base.
    outstandingLove

    Answer by outstandingLove at 1:51 AM on Jun. 24, 2009

  • HONESTLY IF THATS WHAT HE WANTS TO DO U HAVE NOT CHOOSE BT TO SUPPORT HIM. ALTHOUGH I WENT THROUGHT THAT. BT LUCKLY MY BF OR EXBF DIDN'T GO . I JUST TOLD HIM THAT WAT WOULD I TELL OUR DAUGHTER IF HE WASN'T TO COME BACK HOW WOULD I TELL HER THAT HE DIED SERVING HIS COUNTRY. I DON'T THINK THAT WOULD BE FAIR FOR HER. I THINK THAT , THAT IT WOULD BE HARD FOR HER THINKING THAT HE DECIDE TO SERVE HIS COUNTRY THAN TO SPENT TIME WITH HIS ONLY DAUGHTER. SO LET HIM KNOW HOW U FEEL AND HOW WOULD HIS DAUGHTER FEEL IF ANYTHING WAS TO HAPPEN TO HIM. LET HIM KNOW THT U FEAR FOR HIM AND UR GUYS FUTURE. AND LET HIM KNOW THAT HE GGETS TAKEN AWAY ANYTIME THE COUNTRY NEED HIM WITHOUT CONSULTING U FIRST. LET HIM KNOW THAT U CHOOSE A FUTURE WITH HIM NOT WITHOUT HIM. WELL HOPEFULLY MY ADVICE HELPS.
    arlenearreola

    Answer by arlenearreola at 2:13 AM on Jun. 24, 2009

  • I think that being a military wife and family is a very honerable thing....however is also very difficult. Your husband should 100% take your feelings into account for this. He should not join without your consent. There is a very high divorce rate for military relationships because it is difficult to be apart for so long and move all of the time. It is not hte life for every and since you did not meet him while he is in the military...he cannot just up and join on you. You are married with a child and this is a decision for BOTH OF YOU TO MAKE TOGETHER.

    GOOD LUCK!
    Niki_sd

    Answer by Niki_sd at 2:18 AM on Jun. 24, 2009

  • I told my husband before we got married that I never wanted to be a military wife, or even a police/fireman's wife. I do not want to be worried every time my husband leaves for work that he may not come home I could not handle it. DH promised me he would never take a job that had a high risk of taking him away from our family. Tell him how you feel and hope for the best.
    MammaMcC

    Answer by MammaMcC at 11:34 AM on Jun. 24, 2009

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