Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

What to do? Neighbor issue, please advise.

We have a rental home next to us. I won't waste my time or yours in telling you in detail what a complete troll this woman is. Well, her bf has 3 from a previous relationship. All girls about 10, 7 and 5 yrs old. They are spending the next 6 weeks with dad(I use the term loosely). We have a trampoline and a pool. Naturally these draw crowds. This woman has asked if the girls could come jump with my boys. We said sure, why take her being horrible out on kids? But they are mean to my boys and each other, ask for drinks, food, and need to potty more than any kids I have seen. The mom of course disapears, hey we are free daycare right. Now the pool is open, I over heard her tell the girls to put their suits on and stand at our gate until we invite them. I refuse, she never keeps an eye on them, just lets them stay for hours. I have a 2 and 3 yr old to watch my hands are full. Cont-

Answer Question
 
salexander

Asked by salexander at 12:28 PM on Jun. 24, 2009 in Just for Fun

Level 26 (28,366 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • Don't invite them for the pool. And send them home when they are hungry/thirsty, etc. She is taking advantage of you and personally, I wouldn't allow it. I let my boys have friends over for the swingset or the pool, but it's when I decide, not when their friend's mom decides. And if these girls are being mean to your kids, then it's not fair for your kids to have to put up with that. And if she asked, I'd be honest and tell her why I am not letting them come over anymore.
    tropicalmama

    Answer by tropicalmama at 12:32 PM on Jun. 24, 2009

  • cont- I have told the mom she needs to watch them if they want to swim. She never does, just goes back in once they are in the pool. I have had to send them home for fighting with one another. The littlest one will give me dirty looks when I ask her to behave. They come over and would stay till dark if I did not shoo them home. I ask them to go because we need to eat, and I don't want them in the yard while we are not. They give me lip and tell me their mom said they can stay as long as they want. Now I am feeling like a bitch, I love kids I do, but I can only take so much. This woman does not get anything you tell her. So now we swim while three little faces stand in the heat and watch. What should I do?
    salexander

    Answer by salexander at 12:32 PM on Jun. 24, 2009

  • I would just tell it to her straight. Tell her you don't want them there and that you will start charging a fee for the kids to come swim and jump lol. We had the same problem and thats what we did. I hate how people think they can pawn their kids onto other people. And our pool isn't even that great its one of the inflatable ones lol. So the mom was pissed but we haven't had a problem since. I said I was going to charge about 30 dollars a kid lol. She said they would just come over whenever they wanted and I said I'd call the cops for trespassing it worked. it was brutal but hey we haven't had a problem since. good luck :) have fun with it be creative lol.
    Heidikans

    Answer by Heidikans at 12:33 PM on Jun. 24, 2009

  • I know you dont want to take this out on the kids...but you need to close your house down to them...shes completely taking advantage of you..and what would she say if her kids got hurt when she wasnt around?! she couldnt fault you...but id bet shed try...just keep them at arms length..its not the kids fault but you even said the kids are mean to yours...so it seems like a no brainer! just tell them sorry not today...
    sweetstkissez22

    Answer by sweetstkissez22 at 12:44 PM on Jun. 24, 2009

  • Yes she is definately taking advantage of your toys and I wouldn't stand for it. Ignore them for a few days or better yet put up a privacy fence, 6ft on their side of your yard. But don't let them in anymore because it is just going to get worse. I know that it isn't the kids fault but sometimes you have to say no to the youngest to get through to the parents.
    usmc0351wife

    Answer by usmc0351wife at 1:05 PM on Jun. 24, 2009

  • Oh! I am sorry but I would have ZERO tolerance for that Garbage! Mom's like that are LAZY and do not want to deal with their own children and honestly nothing annoys me more than a lazy Mom! You had the kid's, you take care of them and entertain them! It's not your job sweetie!! If she had half a breain it would make her feel like a complete idiot to pawn her kids off on you but clearly she does not!! I understand you feel badly for those kids, I would too, because their Mom is a complete dope!!! But do not ever feel guilty for not wanting to be a free baby sitter for your nieghbors!! You know what I would do?? I would tell her to her face, You know, if you could possibly call me and ask if it is an appropriate time to come over, Come with the kids, Have your kids show some respect, I will be happy to let the kids swim for an hour! You have to set limits or she will always walk all over you!! Sorry if I babbled!!
    Diana44

    Answer by Diana44 at 1:27 PM on Jun. 24, 2009

  • Sorry I mispelled Brain!!! LOL
    Diana44

    Answer by Diana44 at 1:28 PM on Jun. 24, 2009

  • I have to say that this is something you should not have to put up with. You can either tell the mom that you dont want them over there unsupervised (which might make her get up off her lazy a$$ and come to your house, but you dont want that either) OR put up a privacy fence on their side of the yard. We had to do that because of neighbors dogs jumping the fence into our yard. It is the best money I have ever spent. We busted the neighbors kids on our swingset a couple years ago. Well they actually told on themselves and said it was ok for them to be in my yard. No reason just that it was ok. I said umm no its not ok and you have no business in my backyard. No problem with that anymore since the fence either. Good luck. Stand firm! Its your yard, your stuff and you dont have to put up with someone elses kids in/on your stuff.
    KellyOh72

    Answer by KellyOh72 at 4:16 PM on Jun. 24, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN