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My husband might be going to do some training for a new job for 5 months; any advice?

My husband might have to go for training for 5 months for a new job. We haven't been apart for more than 5 days since we got married 2 years ago. Our kids are almost 7, 4 and 1. The older two are my stepkids (from his first marriage); real mom left and is now back in the picture part-time but I am worried about them feeling abandoned again. Any advice about supporting him while dealing with my own feelings of ... well everything; how to prep our kids for this; and in general how to deal? PLEASE HELP!!

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pcmomga

Asked by pcmomga at 3:31 PM on Jun. 24, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (4)
  • How far away will he be? Would he be able to come home for visits-- or would you and the kids be able to visit him?
    When my friend's hubby got sent to Spain for a few months (job related)- She said they both got webcams and then had certain times when they would be on computer on web cam and chat. They also sent daily emails, and called each other on a weekly basis.
    I know it will be hard for the kids to be away from him--- but if he could set up regular times to contact them it would help.
    MizLee

    Answer by MizLee at 4:29 PM on Jun. 24, 2009

  • whether dad is gone to work for the day, deployed, driving a truck or gone for training kids have heard "daddy's at work. He'll be home as soon as he can" for as long as there have been kids. They don't feel abandoned by dad at 1 or 4 as they have no concept of time at those ages. The older one is old enough to understand he's going to be gone for training but will be home soon. I'd give her a calendar and let her mark off the days. Now if he doesn't come back then she might feel abandoned.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 4:33 PM on Jun. 24, 2009

  • It will barley phase them. I'm a military wife. I have been around hundreds of families where dad or mom and even both where deployed. I swear whether there 4 or fourteen it deosn't seem to phase them much. Especailly in your case because you can go see him or he can come back on weekends and you'll be able to call whenever you want. And when he gets back you'll be on such a routine that him being there will throw you out of wack.... Invest in a good vibritor lol!!!!!
    Jillybeans24

    Answer by Jillybeans24 at 4:50 PM on Jun. 24, 2009

  • He will be in the US but won't be able to come home. I will be able to go see him if we can afford it maybe once or twice while he is gone but it will just be overnight trips since he will only be allowed one night a week off. I'm not sure about calling and the webcams (which are great ideas!). One of my concerns is there has been unfaithfulness in his past, how can I help him feel more comfortable leaving us and me for 5 months? I must sound like a whinny baby with my concenrs and everything but I haven't been through this before...any advice about anything that come with being seperated for a long time please send my way!
    pcmomga

    Answer by pcmomga at 8:36 AM on Jun. 25, 2009

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