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If you went to a funeral and the minister asked if anyone wanted to say something nice about the deceased person and the adult children didn't say anything,that would mean?

Either,they were too shy to speak up,they were afraid they'd make a fool of themselves or they didn't have a good relationship with the person.Please choose one,thankyou.

 
countingsparows

Asked by countingsparows at 10:56 AM on Jun. 25, 2009 in Just for Fun

Level 8 (224 Credits)
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Answers (12)
  • You left out that they could be full of grief and not up to talking. Personally I hate funerals and wouldn't want to speak at one even if it was for my parents.
    baconbits

    Answer by baconbits at 11:02 AM on Jun. 25, 2009

  • it could mean any of those - lol we aren't psychic
    teri4lance

    Answer by teri4lance at 11:08 AM on Jun. 25, 2009

  • My parents are wonderful people. If our minister asked anyone to say words - I'd NOT say anything (I'm not even sure I'd want to hear what anyone else wanted/needed to say). I think this is very individual and I know myself enough to know I couldn't do it. They don't hear the words and they know how I feel already.

    I hate funerals - I hate the way that everyone views the family's grieving - I hate having to walk in before the rest of the people at the service - I know it's done this was as a sign of respect but I hate it - just because I'm VERY very private.
    AAAMama

    Answer by AAAMama at 11:10 AM on Jun. 25, 2009

  • We were always very close with my grandmother and when she passed we were very distraught. My sister had written a poem about her but couldn't get past the title...so someone else had to read it. My brother left halfway through to sit outside because he just couldn't cope and everyone's apologies only made it worse for him. Everyone copes differently...perhaps they just couldn't get their emotions to come through in words.
    KaylasMiracle

    Answer by KaylasMiracle at 11:10 AM on Jun. 25, 2009

  • They were not comfortable with public speaking.
    beckcorc

    Answer by beckcorc at 11:17 AM on Jun. 25, 2009

  • Maybe you should have made a poll? It would be easier to keep track of the answers.
    YoungTwinMommy

    Answer by YoungTwinMommy at 11:17 AM on Jun. 25, 2009

  • It could be any of the above.  They could also be to upset to speak.  It all depends on the individual and since I don't know any of the people you speak of, it is impossible to say.

    beeky

    Answer by beeky at 11:19 AM on Jun. 25, 2009

  • Gee, nothing like judging someone who just lost a parent. I would guess they are too distraught to even follow the proceedings.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:28 AM on Jun. 25, 2009

  • I agree...OP, this is not the time to judge. There is no appropriate way to handle grief and the last thing people need someone judging what they do or don't do.

    I suppose that I would think the person was sad, overwhelmed with grief and didn't feel the need to stand in front of a group and try to say words of comfort. I might think that they were not natural public speakers and didn't want to force themselves to do it at a time like this.
    Niki_sd

    Answer by Niki_sd at 11:39 AM on Jun. 25, 2009

  • When my mom died I know I sure as hell didn't feel like getting up and talking in front of people. I just wanted to be left alone. I didn't speak, neither did my brother or my dad. We were too broken up to even think straight and my brother and dad needed other people to care for them (my dad was 53 and my brother was 21 when my mom died). I didn't even get time to grieve because I was taking care of them and my husband and our newborn baby. I was exhausted.
    I don't remember anyone getting up to speak but my cousin conducted the service and gave a beautiful eulogy. I think 1 of my aunts or another cousin spoke up but that was 9 years ago and I was pretty out of it.
    justanotherjen

    Answer by justanotherjen at 11:48 AM on Jun. 25, 2009