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Should I be having another child at 40 and already a grandmother?

I am fixing to be 40 and my children are 23 y.o., 22 y.o., 9 y.o., my stepchild is 27 y.o., and my grandchildren are 5 y.o., 4 y.o., and 2 y.o. My stepson has a stepson who is 6 y.o. and he and his wife are going to have a child. Also my oldest daughter is expecting again. My husband and I have been married for 5 years. We are discussing having a child together. However, my stepson feels that we should just enjoy our grandchildren, and each other, and that we are too old to be having a baby. His wife feels that he may think this because it would take the attention away from him having his first child. She on the other hand thinks we should do whatever would make us happy, but also agrees that we need to just enjoy each other. All of my children have strong opinions on what I should or should not do, when it comes to me having another baby. I do not want to upset their lives. Be completely honest with your opinions.

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Asked by MsBehaving101 at 2:21 PM on Jun. 25, 2009 in Pregnancy

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Answers (24)
  • my mother had another child at 40 and she's doing fine. the only thing is that she would be retired and traveling but instead is going to her daughters school functions at 51 and she's surrounded by 20-30 year old parents. it can be intimidating and she is really tired, but if you want to have another child then do it. just know you'll be 60 when they're in college. no biggie if you're healthy

    Answer by staciandababy at 2:24 PM on Jun. 25, 2009

  • If you want another child, and you can afford it, have a child with your husband. Your children need to get over themselves and be happy for you and your husband in the decisions you make.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:24 PM on Jun. 25, 2009

  • If you are satisfied with life and don't feel you need another child to make it any better then don't have one, but if you and your husband want one I think you should. It's not your stepsons choice to make! Lots of people have kids at 40... Heck lots of people are having their FIRST baby at 40. I think you'll be fine!

    Answer by firethearson at 2:24 PM on Jun. 25, 2009

  • What the stepson thinks really should not have much to do with what you and your husband would like to do. Talk to each other and decide. Best wishes.


    Answer by Teachermom01 at 2:25 PM on Jun. 25, 2009

  • Since when is 40 too old to have children? I know many women over 40 with healthy happy children. If this is something you and your SO want to share with each other then you should do it. Your children and grandchildren may fuss, but how can they not love a baby? As specially one born out of love? Do what you feel in your heart would most satisfying to YOU. If you can handle a bit of jealousy then do it. If the thought of conflict is too disrupting, then maybe you should question why you need to have another child. I say fallow your heart and others will follow also.

    Answer by missv66 at 2:26 PM on Jun. 25, 2009

  • Do whatever makes you happy, tell the kiddos to mind their own business and focus on their babies.

    Answer by Chandra034 at 2:27 PM on Jun. 25, 2009

  • You need to be true to yourself even if it makes others uncomfortable. Think about how you will feel at the end of your life it you don't follow your heart. What if he/she is meant to be a future Einstein or Monet. You never know...

    Answer by Nathskitten at 2:31 PM on Jun. 25, 2009

  • Is he worried about having to take care of the kid if god forbid something happens to you? I would make it clear that he would/will not be responsible for the new baby if something happened to you and your spouse.

    Answer by Nathskitten at 2:33 PM on Jun. 25, 2009

  • Father of the Bride: Part 2
    Enjoy your life, have another baby, its your life, not your kids ♥

    Answer by HelloKitty86 at 2:44 PM on Jun. 25, 2009


    I'm 20 and expecting my second baby any day now. My sister is 18 and just had her baby last week. AND my mom who is 40 is 5 months pregnant!

    We don't have a problem with it. The more the marrier!

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:49 PM on Jun. 25, 2009

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