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How can I get DH to communicate better??

My hubby's biggest problem in our marriage is that he wont say when something bothers him. He just holds it all in as to not cause a fight. That is one of my biggest issues with him, the lack of communication.

And I'm the complete opposite, I say whats wrong when its wrong and have to be heard. I'm kind of a control freak over that issue. I'm trying to work on mine. I just have to learn to bite my tongue. And that's DH biggest issue with me, my 'attitude'. So I'm really trying to work on it.

But how do I get him to open up more and communicate with me?


Asked by MrsDuff at 2:23 PM on Jun. 25, 2009 in Relationships

Level 12 (776 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (2)
  • ^I agree with everything this poster said.

    Work on controlling your tongue.

    Remember not to sweat the small stuff. Some things--little inconveniences, changes of plan, etc.--really don't matter and there's no point getting riled up over it.

    Your habit of "saying what's wrong when it's wrong" probably comes off as nagging to him. Of course he doesn't want to open up if that's how he's treated.

    Stop sweating the small stuff and stop being such a "control freak". Don't complain about things that don't matter. Only fret over the big issues.

    When you discuss problems (or anything) with him, don't disregard his opinion. This is your husband. Listen to him and respect what he has to say. Show him that you appreciate his opinions.

    Actually, just show that you appreciate him in general.

    Answer by Mousuke at 3:00 PM on Jun. 25, 2009

  • Prove to him that you will not get mad or defensive or hateful when he does finally open up. Even if something he says hurts your feelings just take it is stride as constructive critism and tell him you are glad he told you so that you can work on it.. Eventually he will see that opening up isn't gonna cause a fight and he'll do it all the time....Careful what you wish for tho you might not like the results lol

    Answer by heather.darin at 2:27 PM on Jun. 25, 2009