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is being a grand parent a right or a privelage?

i dont like my mil and fil at all..but my son has fun being with him.. i dont want to be selfish but my mil called a crazy bit.. last week and i didnt want to punish my son bc she is so mean.. so today he has spent the whole day overthere... what are opinions on grandparent rights.

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Asked by Anonymous at 10:44 PM on Jun. 25, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (23)
  • I believe it is their right. Unless they are abusing it. If she is not appropriate to you in front of your children then i would sit down with her and tell her that she either needs to stop, and respect you AND your family while in the presence of the children or she will just not be allowed to see them at all.

    Answer by outstandingLove at 10:47 PM on Jun. 25, 2009

  • I would let him go spend time with them, it wouldn't be fair for your child not to get to know his grandparents cuz you don't like them, as long as they treat him well

    Answer by looovemybabies at 10:48 PM on Jun. 25, 2009

  • When married.. I believe my parents have a right. His parents have the priv.

    Answer by victoria.mommy at 10:49 PM on Jun. 25, 2009

  • I believe we should respect our spouse's parents and attempt to get along, having a positive attitude helps the situation.

    Answer by prettyrayray at 10:54 PM on Jun. 25, 2009

  • well......i don't really see it as either! it is something that just happens to them! same with being a parent!! i am sure someone will have a bone to pick with that last statement but, come on It's true!!!! I don't dare believe I was priveleged(sp?) to have my child. I have not done anything to deserve my son! He was a gift! , one i never wanted or asked for but a gift all the same!

    Answer by truthteller0722 at 10:56 PM on Jun. 25, 2009

  • I believe it's a RIGHT! You wouldn't have the life and kids you have if it wasn't for your parents or his parents. I truly think you have to make an effort to have a healthy relationship with your in laws. I know there are certain situations where no matter what you do, it's impossible to have a relationship. But I think the kids truly benefit from having active grandparents.

    Oh and to victoria.mommy:

    Are you kidding me that it's your parents right but his parents privelage??? How is that FAIR???

    Answer by mommymine3 at 11:02 PM on Jun. 25, 2009

  • Being a grandparent is a natural thing--your child has a child...automatically you are a grandparent. Rights and priviledges? What do you mean? I don't know what your problem is with your in-laws but if they are good to your kids, they can spend time with them. Maybe you should try to be more of a daughter in law and be less judgemental? Family is important and you need to get along with all of them, not criticize and find fault.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:17 PM on Jun. 25, 2009

  • victoria.mommy: what makes your parents so special that they have a right to your children but your husbands parents don't? You are a selfish person.

    BOTH sets of grandparents have the right to see their grandchildren unless they do something harmful either physically or mentally to the CHILD. I know someone who has stopped letting her mother see her daughter because grandma is making the teens emotional disturbances worse and the teen has violent breakdowns after being around her grandmother, so grandma has lost her rights because of her poor choices.

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 11:33 PM on Jun. 25, 2009

  • being a grand parent is not a right.. it is a privelage. my mother will never see my little girl cuz of the way she acts. now thats not your mom and dad... so if the father wants your son to see them well. you really cant say no. . unless there doing something that would make sence for you to stop takeing your son over there. but it sounds like your son really likes being with them.

    also i agree with outstandingLove... if there doing thos things then no they should not be around him. you have your family and you have to take care of them, your hubby, your kid, and you.

    Answer by de_sly at 11:33 PM on Jun. 25, 2009

  • Being a grandparent is a privilege, not a right. There are no laws that say my daughter has to have a relationship with ANY of the inlaws (or my relatives either). If my mil called me a bitch she would never see my kid again until she apologized. Why would you allow your child to be around someone who disrespects you? What does that teach your child?

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:47 PM on Jun. 25, 2009

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