Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

am i the only one? probably not.

i am a sahm,and i usually stay in my pj's all day.i have no reason to get dressed cause i don't ever leave the house unless my husband off work , cause i don't have a drivers license. so i really don't feel the need to get up and get dressed to just stay home all day.but lately i've been feeling self conscious about my body, and feeling like my husband doesn't find me attractive anymore.over the 7 years that we've been together i've gained a lot of weight. most of it was while i was pregnant. and i know i don't look the same,and that's why i cover myself up.i know it's cause i have low self esteem, i always have, cause he says he likes the way i look. my question is,for those who stay at home, and if there are any who feel like i do, does getting up and actually putting effort into how you look make you feel any better about your self? maybe if i looked decent and not like i rolled out of bed i'd feel more attractive to him

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:32 AM on Jun. 26, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (13)
  • I don't stay home now, but i did in the past. Getting up and taking time to shower, put on an outfit and maybe a little makeup will make a huge difference!!! It is like you are showing yourself some respect!!
    ria7

    Answer by ria7 at 11:35 AM on Jun. 26, 2009

  • I could have answered this question, but, you answered your own question just fine, and thats a good thing.


    does getting up and actually putting effort into how you look make you feel any better about your self?YES maybe if i looked decent and not like i rolled out of bed i'd feel more attractive to him

    Kat122

    Answer by Kat122 at 11:39 AM on Jun. 26, 2009

  • GOOD grief, I didn't mean for it to be that big and I apologize!
    Kat122

    Answer by Kat122 at 11:40 AM on Jun. 26, 2009

  • it's ok. i just wanted some other opinions. cause usually no matter what i do or wear i still think i look like crap. even before my weight gain. and i have lost about 20lbs recently, but i don't really see a difference in how i look, and it's discouraging.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:45 AM on Jun. 26, 2009

  • Yes, I notice on days that I get up super early, take my shower, get dressed, do my make-up, and start the daily chores I feel better about myself. When I feel better about myself DH notices. On days where I just get up when the kids do, take care of their needs, and shower during naps I don't feel as good.
    LolosMom

    Answer by LolosMom at 11:50 AM on Jun. 26, 2009

  • Personally when I was a SAHM I founf that I felt like crap if I didn't get dressed. I tended to get more done during the day if I got up and changed my clothes. Even if I put on lounge type clothes I changed my clothes. Because I felt better I think DH found me more attractive too.
    aeneva

    Answer by aeneva at 11:59 AM on Jun. 26, 2009

  • I've noticed that working out REALLY boosts my mood. And I see results, which REALLY makes me feel good about myself. Not just weight dropping, but muscle defining. And I do my work outs as I clean, so I get two jobs done at once.

    Also what makes me feel good about myself is acomplishing something and not just housework, but other stuff. Today , our fridge wasn't cooling, so I took the freezer apart and defrosted it and put it back together. It works now and I did it all by myself. I've also poured concrete, laid tile, and fixed some plumbing issues all by myself. My photoraphy work also gives me that sense of accomplishment.

    I could care less if I get dressed if we're staying home all day. My husband doesn't care and thinks I look good no matter what... but when I do leave the house, I make sure I look nice.

    Cavalrybaby02

    Answer by Cavalrybaby02 at 12:17 PM on Jun. 26, 2009

  • Also look into getting your license, it really does help to have that sense of independence that you don't need him to go somewhere. Even if you have to take him to work in the mornings so you can have the car.
    Cavalrybaby02

    Answer by Cavalrybaby02 at 12:17 PM on Jun. 26, 2009

  • It does take a little effort but it will be well worth it. You feel better about yourself. Your husband feels better about you as well. Work on the weight. Get your self together and take the baby for a long walk each day. This is a problem a lot of young moms have. Make a plan and stick to it. Good luck. grannywilson
    grannywilson

    Answer by grannywilson at 12:37 PM on Jun. 26, 2009

  • Maybe u should do a small work - out routine during the day (whenever its most convient for u & ur LO) this would boost ur self asteem & help u get back into shape. U dont have to do anything too long just like 15 mins a day or a few times a week for like 30 mins. I also spend most of the winter sitting in my PJ's as well b/c we dont leave the house very often during that time so u r not the only one. I do however, have PJ's that I do not mind letting other ppl see me in. One's that r nice velvet/soft pants w/o designs on them just solid color & a matching sweatshirt or something. These r the ones I usually wear.
    Mel30248

    Answer by Mel30248 at 12:37 PM on Jun. 26, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN