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am i over reacting?

i am very protective of ppl talking about my kids, even their step sister, it goes right through me to her hear say< shes my SD not my bio> that they are weird, or behind, stupid, things like that, shes 10 and the oldest of mine is only 3, so i know there is quite a gap, but i WILL never allow my children to talk abd about one antother! thats horrible! i want her dad to say something to her about it but he says im voer reacting..

also she says that my 3 year old isnt smart because he dosent talk much, and tries to dicipline him, which also goes right through me!

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:51 PM on Jun. 26, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (7)
  • dh needs to step up and let him know she keeps opening her mouth she might get it poped by someone. also the kid is 3 when she was 3 was she a rocket scientest??
    tabbys4

    Answer by tabbys4 at 10:55 PM on Jun. 26, 2009

  • my ten year old and 4 year old exchange insults pretty regularly when they fighting about something and my ten year old tries her hand at ruling the roost over my four year old.... my friend's kids do similar stuff and it cuts right through me too! I constantly have to remind my 10 yo that she is NOT the Mother and if her brother is getting into trouble that I will be the one that handles it! Luckily, my kids are great the majority of the time, but as they get older the sibling rivalry seems to get worse!

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:06 PM on Jun. 26, 2009

  • Its wonderful that you will never let your kids talk about each other like that and defiantly her father should be disciplining her because at that age really no matter what you say she probably wont really listne to you but usually if the father really gets involved in this she should listen.

    But i would like to say please for the sake of other children never allow your kids to talk about not only each other badly but also other children. More parents need to step up and not allow their children to participate in bullying and criticism. I know you cant stop it completely but if you teach that those things are not ok to do to anyone maybe we will see a change in the way people treat each other!
    Alie1313

    Answer by Alie1313 at 11:08 PM on Jun. 26, 2009

  • I don't think that you are overreacting at all. If your stepdaughter continues this it will hurt their self-esteem when they are older and disciplining your son for not talking might make him want to talk less. I hope your hubby steps in soon.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:22 PM on Jun. 26, 2009

  • I guess I can understand not wanting your kids to call one another names, etc. But the problem is in the world, other kids and people will. They may grow up and have a boss that does this, and they won't emotionally know how to defend themselves against a verbal onslaught like that. I am striving to teach my children that their self esteem should be based on their own impression of themselves, not the opinions of others. My sis and I still trade insults, (mostly good naturedly) but I also know that if anyone else tries to hurt the other, we back each other up, and that's something to look at. But really, maybe the SD is just a bit jealous and it her way of "striking back".
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:28 AM on Jun. 27, 2009

  • My kids argue daily. Sometimes name calling or pushing. I don't let my kids call each other names (or anyone else for that matter). In our house, degrading words are cuss words (stupid, idiot, etc) I don't tolerate it, but really, we can not prevent it, we can only teach them afterward. Well, one day about a year ago, my kids and the neighbor kids were on our trampoline. One of the other boys (5) pushed my daughter (8). My son (5) saw what happened and punched the other kid in the face because he hurt his sister. Of course, both boys got into trouble, but the point of my story is, just because they argue doesn't mean they don't or won't have a great relationship. You might want to consider being less protective of your "own" children. I may be way off base here, but you probably give your SD crap for being mean to your 3 year old which causes resentment and hostility. Your 3 year old feeds off your emotions.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:13 AM on Jun. 27, 2009

  • if they were closer in age or the 3 year old could deffend himself against her i would be less agitated about it, but with a 7 year age gap its not fair.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:13 AM on Jun. 27, 2009

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