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How do I get my 12 month old to stop slapping, pinching, and biting?

My son is just about a year old and recently started slapping (especially when you go to give him kisses), pinching, and biting (to the point of drawing blood). On top of that he pulls hair and will pinch at mine and my husbands nipples and after he does these things he laughs about it. I have tried redirecting him, time outs, stern "NO'S", and gentle slaps on the hand. What else could I do to try to correct him?

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Asked by Fairyonfire1886 at 10:01 PM on Jun. 27, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

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Answers (9)
  • this may sound way out of line but here's what I did- when he say bites you ABSOLUTE streight face- and silence put him in his high chair (snug) face the wall in total silence--lights out too - first offense 90 seconds -- second offense 3 minutes 3rd offense4.5 minutes ... he'll get it eventually
    now heres 2 key things to this you need to reward his good behavior with hugs and kisses and 1:1 time peek a boo that type of stuff--make a big deal of good behavior
    also if there is more then 3 hours between offenses count it as the first offense again chances are he doent remember

    Answer by MELRN at 10:11 PM on Jun. 27, 2009

  • Okay, you cannot put a child that is 1 year old in time out in a corner for 3-5 minutes in the dark (or no dark). That is CRUEL. Babies have no concept of time, and 3 minutes to you will be an eternity to is an him. That is a totally unnaceptable solution!!


    Answer by Arkaidy at 10:18 PM on Jun. 27, 2009

  • And now for the original question. This seems to be the topic of the day! I'll just re post what I said to another mama :)

    This is COMPLETELY normal. COMPLETELY. I think almost every child goes through this.

    When he does this, say "oww" or whatever, and show him how to "be gentle" and stroke his arm and talk sofly. I did this with my daughter and at first she would still do it, but kiss me right after, lol, and now she is 2 and absolutely never hits or anything.

    Just be consistent, get down to his level, and have the compassion to know that he isn't doing it to hurt you, he is just testing his world. It won't happen overnight, it takes time to teach :)

    I love the Dr. Sears Discipline Book, which addresses these concerns and shows you how to handle your children the RIGHT way!

    Answer by Arkaidy at 10:20 PM on Jun. 27, 2009

  • I would say OW! and tell her that it is mean, and show her how to be more gentle and play nice. If she continued the behavior, walk away and stay out of reach. If your child is hitting or slapping another child, separate them immediately and ask your child to apologize.

    I communicated what pain is to my daughter with the word "mean" when she'd get hurt. If she fell down and cry or run into a wall (lol) when I knew she was hurt but not injured I took the oppurtunity to say "Mean!" and communicate with her. Now if I call her mean for hitting me in the face with a book, she cries and wants a hug. I hug her and ask for an apology. She's also been learning time out, but she's 2 now and understands that more.

    Answer by Seven07 at 10:56 PM on Jun. 27, 2009

  • OMG. My 14 month old does the EXACT same thing. Only, he laughs when I say 'owww' and tell him that isn't nice. I'm stuck on what to do too.

    Answer by His_Mommy26 at 12:22 AM on Jun. 28, 2009

  • It's very important to deal with this NOW. Next time he does it - say very FIRMILY - NO BITE!! NO HIT!! (WHATEVER HE DID) - PUT HIM SOMEPLACE WHERE HE CAN'T GET OUT AND WALK AWAY. FOR HIS AGE - THE LIMIT IS ONE MINUTE (ONE FOR EACH YEAR OF AGE) Have NO contact with him until his time -out is over. Hug and and reinforce - NO Hitting Mommy (whoever) Biting is a very hard habit to break. I AM NOT RECOMMENDING THIS - OK? But, once, when my son bit another child - I said do you know how much it hurts for someone to bite you? He sayed "no ". So, I gently SHOWED HIM. I didn't leave any marks, but it was just enough to show him that it does, indeed, HURT, to be bitten. That, along with the immediate punishment, finally worked. But, please understand here, I'm NOT recommending child abuse by biting your child.
    The main thing with this problem and all others is to be CONSISTENT. God Bless you.

    Answer by Waycross48 at 3:08 AM on Jun. 28, 2009

  • listen my 1 year old son does the same thing and i broke him of it because everytime he would hit my in my face i would calmly but sternly tell him no not nice that hurts mommy or daddy or who ever and put him down and he would loose his mind so upset and i would wait oh maybe 2 minutes before i would show him any attention because all they really want is attention it is our job to teach them the positive attention rather than the negative but he now does not hit me because he knows he will be put down and the game that we were playing is over try it for a week see if it doest make a difference sounds a lot better to me than in a corrner and lights out and all that stuff

    Answer by rjsjjs1 at 7:59 AM on Jun. 28, 2009

  • My 13 month old just laughs when I tell her no. It's very frustrating. I've started using natural consequences like when she plays with the lever to let the water out of the bathtub then bath time is over. When she tries to play with electrical cords, I turn the whatever off, and plug the socket with a socket cover. When she gets too close to the tv, I turn the tv off and we leave the room. Of course this is all after I've told her no.

    Answer by tcoker at 9:06 AM on Jun. 28, 2009

  • I think the laughing at you is also a phase. My DD used to laugh at me when I cried, they don't understand things like we do, and that's important to realize.

    She is 2 now and if I'm crying, she comes over and asks me if I'm okay, strokes my face, and kisses me.

    Answer by Arkaidy at 5:00 PM on Jun. 28, 2009

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