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My Mom is being strange... what would you do?

Ok, so my Mom was coming around a couple or once a week when my DD was first born and now she wants me to put in effort and go out to meet her places. The problem is my DD is very alert and so I don't go out at all. If I do she will not sleep. She is still only 4 months and needs her sleep. So I have given up going out to keep her well rester. Plus she is not immunized yet and I am very cautious about the flu (it is winter in Australia) If she doesn't get it she goes into meltdown at night and is just really hard to settle to sleep. I have explained this to my Mom but she doesn't seem to get it. I really don't care if I see her or not but what should I say and what would you do?


Asked by mummylovebaby at 11:20 PM on Jun. 27, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (9)
  • This must be your first born. You are overly cautious and that is normal. You are protecting your little one as much as possible. However, your baby needs to get out of the house. Fresh air is mandatory for proper growth and health (physically and mentally). Your little one needs to build resistance to germs of all kinds. Overly sanitizing is not necessarily a good thing. That little immune system doesn't have a opportunity to become strong. Go visit others. Its okay. Yep, your babe will get sick from time to time but that is a normal part of life. Try not to be overly attentive when it comes to sleeping. By that I mean, do not run and pick the baby up if she coughs, whines a little bit etc......Mostly she will drift back off. If something is wrong---trust me---she will let you know. If you choose to disturb sleeping time---get ready for many nights of unrest. Children do what works.


    Answer by Anonymous at 9:56 AM on Jun. 30, 2009

  • You need to get out of the house, and so does your baby. Unless the temperature is bitterly cold (under 20 farenheit), take your baby out.

    Answer by rkoloms at 11:27 PM on Jun. 27, 2009

  • I agree w/ koloms. It's a little scary to take your baby out that young, but you will find that he/she WILL sleep anywhere. I have a Greco stroller that has a back which lays down. If you don't have one, I suggest finding one if you can afford it. Lay him/her down and put a heavy blanket down so it's dark. Trust me he/she will sleep! And he/she will let you know when it's time.

    Answer by HaydensMommy708 at 11:31 PM on Jun. 27, 2009

  • getting babies out of the house usually wears them out and they sleep better. I wouldn't stay home with her. I'd get her out and get some fresh air. As long as someone doesn't cough or sneeze on her I'm sure she'll be fine (the baby not mom). I think you are a bit over protective of the child. She'll be fine. Go meet mom.

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:37 PM on Jun. 27, 2009

  • Thanks ladies but it seems you don't understand high need babies. She will not sleep while out. We have tried. She cannot block out the stimulation and gets very overly stimulated and then overtired.
    We do get out for a least 30-1 hour for a walk or to the shops.

    We have the best stroller, bassinett, car seat and still she won't sleep. Not even while driving in the car.

    I'm not scared about taking her out I just don't want to have the meltdown at the end of the day because she didn't sleep because we were out

    Answer by mummylovebaby at 11:39 PM on Jun. 27, 2009

  • Yeah over protective of sleep!

    Answer by mummylovebaby at 11:40 PM on Jun. 27, 2009

  • Honey, your baby is old enough to go out and be exposed to germs unless it is bitterly cold out. If she isn't exposed to germs she won't be able to build up her natural immunities to disease and germs. You could meet your mom for an hour and your baby should be fine. Even if your mothers comes to your home, that could overstimulate the baby too.

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 11:58 PM on Jun. 27, 2009

  • I understand what you are all trying to say but the reality is that my beautiful DD is so incredibly alert that she does not sleep while out. So for that reason I will not be selfish and make her miss a nap. Then have to watch her meltdown at night. She is exposed to the outdoors everyday for 30 mins to an hour and we go out irregularly. Just have to choose our special occasions. Yahh a first birthday of my BFF DD in July. Thankyou for your answers but you do not understand high need babies and if you did you would answer very differently.

    Answer by mummylovebaby at 2:05 AM on Jun. 28, 2009

  • Okay, I know you claim we dont understand high needs babies, but i'm going to tell you the same things the other ladies are and my daughter was a very finicky sleeper as well. She's almost 2 years old and still will not sleep unless she's in the car or her own bed. So sometimes she misses nap time when we're out yet.

    But, you really do need to take her out, if your going out for 30 minutes to an hour anyways, why not just use that time that she would be out anyways to go meet mom? You need to go out as much for your own sake as you need to for hers. She needs to be exposed to outside experiences and outside germs to build up her immune system. And if she never gets out she will be a painfully shy toddler.

    My ex's cousin NEVER went out with her son either and he was the most painfully shy kid until his grandma started taking him out when she babysat. He finally adjusted and is doing better now, but kids need stimulation

    Answer by Pudge_Pie20 at 1:43 PM on Jun. 28, 2009