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Should you let your kids be around your sibling if that sibling doesn't like you?

I have a sibling that has been very toxic to me all of my life. She is eight years older than I am. She told me face to face after an arguement that she only wanted to see my kids not me anyway. She also told another sibling that she could go the rest of her life without seeing me, another sister of ours and our brother. She is a hot head, control freak, and refuses to see any faults that she may have. She is quick to point out my flaws and make snide remarks to me. If I say something back she attacks me verbally. She has even done this once in front of my children. My oldest child (age 6) still remembers that and it happened almost two years ago. She has caused me to have a low self esteem. I don't "hate" her I just find her to be extremely toxic. She spoke unfavorable about one of my nephews' mom and also one of my neices' mom in front of the child. Any responses would be much appreciated.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:41 PM on Jun. 28, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (5)
  • hmm, it's difficult bc you would have to decide if you think that she is going to bad-mouth you or act inappropriately in front of your kids. would it be possible to have them spend time with her and someone else you actually trust? that way you could ask them how it went and then decide from there? like sort of a supervised visitation i guess (but don't make it obvious lol)
    princessbeth79

    Answer by princessbeth79 at 9:02 PM on Jun. 28, 2009

  • I would definitely not allow my children to be around a person like that without me being there to protect them from her venom....sibling or not. These are YOUR children...they are part of YOU. Either she accepts you or doesn't...but you and your kids are a package deal. Do you really think they will be missing out on anything positive if they are without a relationship with their aunt?
    MamaJen74

    Answer by MamaJen74 at 9:03 PM on Jun. 28, 2009

  • no
    SoKamele

    Answer by SoKamele at 9:12 PM on Jun. 28, 2009

  • If she is as toxic as she sounds, she could and probably, would eventually turn on your kids as well. I would limit contact a lot! It's harmful to your kids to see you hurt by her, too!
    Good luck!
    Gwynyth

    Answer by Gwynyth at 9:27 PM on Jun. 28, 2009

  • No! There is no reason for your kids to be exposed to her venom and poisonous attitude. You mentioned that your 1 child still remembers an incident from 2 years ago. Do you really want your children around that? She may even be mad at your kids and turn that venom on them. You are within your rights to cut her out of their lives! If she does not like it too bad.
    MizLee

    Answer by MizLee at 9:27 PM on Jun. 28, 2009

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