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You Know You Need to Lose Weight When...

I posted this earlier, need more feedback!

I'm starting my diet tomorrow and I need some diet humor to keep me inspired.
Please finish the phrase above with something you think is funny.
Here's a few of mine...

You know you need to lose weight..

when you do push ups & your stomach refuses to leave the floor
when you consider tying your shoes an exercise
when they stop asking if "you want fries with that"... of course you do & they know it
when when your nuvaring is too tight
when your panyhose catch on fire from your legs rubbing together
when the back of your neck looks like a pack of hotdogs
when your cereal bowl comes with a lifeguard
when your drivers license says picture continued on the back
when you go to the zoo & the elephants throw you peanuts
when your belly button doesn't have lint -- it has sweaters
when you swear by the Garlic Diet: You don't lose weight, you jus

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:24 PM on Jun. 28, 2009 in Diet & Fitness

Answers (4)
  • When people keep asking you when your due...and your not pregnant!!
    sadira29

    Answer by sadira29 at 9:27 PM on Jun. 28, 2009

  • ooops! Supposed to say... When you swear by the garlic diet: you don't lose weight, you just look thinner from a distance.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:28 PM on Jun. 28, 2009

  • When your NuvaRing is too tight?!?!? LMFAO!!!!!
    zorrokat

    Answer by zorrokat at 8:58 PM on Jun. 29, 2009

  • Diets don't work, they just keep you on the gain/lose rollercoaster.
    In order to get to and maintain a healthy weight, you need to have a healthy lifestyle; this has the added bonus of setting a great example for your kids.
    Start with regular exercise, as simple as walking, for at least 20 min a day at least 3 times a week. Next, drink your water! at least 8 8oz glasses a day. Now, eat your fruits & veggies! 7-8 servings a day, in at least three different colors. Eat your whole grains (loaded with fiber, protein, and lots of energy-giving nutrients), 6-7 servings a day. Cut way back on (or eliminate) meat & dairy. Add beans, lentils & tofu to your diet. You can get free meal plans and recipes from Dr. McDougall, or find his books at your local library: http://www.drmcdougall.com/free.html
    Eat an apple or a big salad before meals
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 10:02 PM on Jun. 29, 2009

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