Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Do you ever think of things like this?

4 years ago and then 1 year later I had miscarriages. They were both very early so while I was devastated I never really considered them lost children. But today something got me thinking that if things had gone differently I would have a 2 or 3 year old(or around that). It just kinda hit me wrong. I have a beautiful 14 month old now and I know the past is the past and everything happens for a reason, it's just kinda sad.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:25 PM on Jun. 29, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (8)
  • I never had a miscarriage, but I know I would think of that as well. I am sorry for your sadness. =(

    Answer by mom2twobabes at 10:26 PM on Jun. 29, 2009

  • Never had a miscarraige, but I had a stillbirth and infant death. I know the feeling. My baby would be 3 and the other 7 months.
    I'm sorry for your losses.

    Answer by babycakes254 at 10:28 PM on Jun. 29, 2009

  • I had a miscarriage and then a couple months later got pregnant and had my 2nd daughter. And yes sometimes it really hurts even though I adore my little one. I wonder if things would be different if i had been going through so many marital problems that at frist I didn't want it but by the time I went and got the ultrasound I did want it but it was already dead.... I still cry from time to time its been almost 2 years. I wonder if it will always hurt.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:51 PM on Jun. 29, 2009

  • I am an only child but my mother had a miscarriage when I was 8. I sometimes think how crazy it is that I almost had a little brother or sister. I can't imagine it.

    Answer by jessicarae787 at 11:10 PM on Jun. 29, 2009

  • I know it's so hard mama. I had a m/c 1 year ago. I am now pregnant with #2, but wonder how it all would have been different if my last pregnancy went full term. I just tell myself that it was not meant to be and that in due time, I will see why.

    Be strong.

    Answer by Arkaidy at 11:49 PM on Jun. 29, 2009

  • I had a misscarrige at about 2 weeks. I occassionally think about it, but if I hadn't lost that first one, I would never had my DS. I got preggo about 2-3 months after my miscarriage.

    But I do occassionally think of what that child would have been like versus my DS.

    Answer by NickyJamesMom at 12:12 AM on Jun. 30, 2009

  • For me with my early miscarriage, it would have been my first child. So I wonder how he or she would have impacted our family. Would I have just had my daughter and stopped with two or gone on and had my twins also.

    When it first happened, then I had trouble conceiving afterwards I wondered if that had been my only chance.


    Answer by teamquinn at 1:14 AM on Jun. 30, 2009

  • I had two miscarriages between my two children. When I was going through that time trying to have a baby and losing the pregnancies, it seemed very significant to me....But by the time I had my second child I really didn't think much about it anymore. Once in a while I think about the timing, but it is hard for me to imagine having any other child at any other time than the ones I have had! It would be harder to move on from it if I had not finally gone on to have my child. I don't think about the lost "children"---I consider them lost "pregnancies" and over time they have gotten less and less important. Everyone's experience is different, though.

    Answer by BJoan at 7:22 AM on Jun. 30, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.