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How do u deal with this? step kids problem

Everytime my husband's teenage son comes and visit our relationship fell apart. He disrespect me but not infront of my husband. The last time he came and visits he cuts my shoes with scissors (4 pairs) and i only found out few months after. He also stole few hundreds in my wallet when I left it on the table. He does silly thing like copying me when I am talking when my husband goes to work yet when my husband is around he behaves as if he is such a good son. I tried telling my husband all the things he does but he said his son will never do such a thing so I stopped telling him anything. It is clear to me that he wanted me and my husband to get a divorce. I can see him smiling and happy whenever he hears my husband and i are having a fight.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:49 AM on Jun. 30, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • Um, I personally, would say NO MORE. The kid is a teen... I wouldn't really feel right with my husband's teenage son in the house alone with me anyway. Tell your husband, the kid makes you feel uncomfortable and that you are sorry, but he can only see him when he is with him. You do not want to be left alone with him EVER. That's it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:58 AM on Jun. 30, 2009

  • see that is the thing I wasn't telling my husband. one time i had my feet up on the table while watching tv like i used to do. He came out from the room and look at me really funny then i realised he probably seen my underwear. He came back to the room and masterbate. He then washed the sheets after. It made me feel uncomfortable. I thought of him just a child then this things happened. How can i even discuss this things with my husband if he doesn't believe me anyway.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:06 AM on Jun. 30, 2009

  • Well it sounds like you all need to sit down and put everything on the table and if that doesn't change anything then i would make some changes also tell your hubby that you will no longer deal with being disrespected in your own home and leave at that. This child needs to not be in the home without his father in the home with him.
    Selling $$ and being disrespected in your own home SHOULD not be tolerated. Stand up for yourself. Your hubby sounds like he doesn't want to deal with this situation.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:10 AM on Jun. 30, 2009

  • NEVER leave hundreds of dollars in a wallet and leave the wallet laying around especially if there are teens around. Even good teens can be tempted. Put your stuff in your room and lock the bedroom door. I have teen grandkids. I love them but they are teens. They love drama. They love the attention they get, good or bad. He doesn't value your opinion of him so he's not going to behave for you. Limit his time visiting in your home and preferrably when dad can take off work and spend time with him. Do NOT argue in front of him no matter what. If you disagree on something then postpone the discussion until a later time when you are alone. Don't give him the satisfaction of hearing you and dad going at it. My mom was not an educated woman but she was a smart woman. She would probably tell you to "kill him with kindness". Go overboard doting on the boy. If you can be that good of an actress. Mom could. I'm not that good! lol
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:10 AM on Jun. 30, 2009

  • This child has alot of problems and he needs alot of help.
    Masterbating is normal but not thinking about you while doing it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:13 AM on Jun. 30, 2009

  • How much are you fighting? If it's a lot, then naturally he wont like you because he's taking his dad's side. You need to be able to communicate with your husband. Did you bring him the cut up shoes? I would get proof and show him the evidence. Dont ever keep quiet!
    lowencope

    Answer by lowencope at 11:16 AM on Jun. 30, 2009

  • p.s. DONT talk about the masturbation issue! That will just put a thicker wall up because that is very embarassing. Just keeps your legs closed around horny teenagers.
    lowencope

    Answer by lowencope at 11:21 AM on Jun. 30, 2009

  • Tell little hubby to wise up and respect you as his wife.

    He does not believe what you are saying...what kind of marriage is that?

    I would sit his little butt down and lay down the law.

    Tell him what you will tolerate from his son and what you will not tolerate..
    If he chooses not to believe you I would tell him to find a new place to live!

    You have to be firm and strong..
    Dannee

    Answer by Dannee at 11:24 AM on Jun. 30, 2009

  • thank u all we don't fight much only when this kid is around. I didn't show him the evidence bec I just realised it after when my friend pointed it out to me. Now that I told him he is not a child anymore and i am not feeling comfortable about it he seem he is getting it a bit. I hope so anyway.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:31 AM on Jun. 30, 2009

  • You need a hidden camera. Or a tape recorder, that should do the trick.
    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 11:42 AM on Jun. 30, 2009

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