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How can i get my boys to stop telling each other they are stupid?!

I cant stand the disrespect. My older boy is 4 1/2 yrs and my younger is 3 1/2 yrs. I know my older one started it (not that it matters who started it) but now they both go at it all the time. And i dont know how to stop them. I've done time out. I've tried talking to them about how rude it is. I've pointed out that stupid is not something that i call other people. I dont know what to do. But it HAS to stop. That kind of disprespect will not be tolerated in our house.


Asked by outstandingLove at 12:47 PM on Jun. 30, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

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Answers (6)
  • Don't tolerate it. Set a punishment for the word stupid and stick with it. Stupid = 5 minutes in the sad chair (or however you handle timeout); or stupid = no TV for a day. Whatever works for you, be firm and be consistent.

    Answer by rkoloms at 4:20 PM on Jun. 30, 2009

  • I agree that it is about disrespecting each other and that will take a long time to overcome, but in the mean time I would ban the word stupid from their vocabulary. I would set a consequence for calling each other stupid and stick to it. My oldest went through a stage where everything was "STOOOOPID"...Gawd... Why is my shoe so stoopid? why is this fork so stoopid? why is this haircut so stoopid? It went on and on. Finally we had to ban the word. If her said stupid he had to go to his room. It stopped after a couple of weeks of consistent consequence. It didn't matter to him that it was rude and disrespectful it was the "it" word for the week.

    Answer by Nathskitten at 1:00 PM on Jun. 30, 2009

  • Please if you figure out how to get them to stop will you let me know so I can try it. my boys are 4 and 2 and they call each other "poopy". I hate it and I have tried everything to get them to stop but they just keep doing it. They think it is funny!!!!


    Answer by joleensboys at 1:42 PM on Jun. 30, 2009

  • Do you let them watch Spongebob by any chance? My niece did this too and that is her favorite show. I say stop cartoon time if they have it and let them know how disrespectful it is and how you will not tolerate it. Repeat timeouts every time it happens.


    Answer by Navymama at 4:37 PM on Jun. 30, 2009

  • Often kids are rude to each other when they don't feel loved. Remind them how much you love them. Encourage them to say things they like about each other. Maybe you could have it be a game to find as many things as they like about the other brother as they can.

    Answer by Jeanere at 7:03 PM on Jul. 2, 2009

  • Navymama
    We dont watch much TV in our house at all. and when my boys do watch TV it's always Noggin, PBS or a pre-approved movie. I dont believe that Spongebob or most other shows on Nickalodean are appropriate for young children.

    Jeanere, thank you. i tell my boys i love them often. We have cuddle times every morning and every night. Athough, there may be other reasons for them feeling not loved as we have recently had a dramatic change in the family dynamics.

    Answer by outstandingLove at 8:21 PM on Jul. 2, 2009