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I don't know what to do... please help

My boys are 5 and (2 in August). My older one will take a toy that he doesn't want to play with and wave it in the younger ones face just to tease him and run away while the younger one will scream and get mad, chasing after the toy. I don't know how to discipline my older one to keep him from doing this. It goes on ALL day long.

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Asked by momluja at 3:59 PM on Jun. 30, 2009 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 7 (159 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • I did the very same thing to my sister, I dont know how you can stop it really, kids well brothers will do this, but I did it to my sis because I was jealous of her so I wanted her to hurt. Maybe this might help you. Kids will fight with each other but not this bad or long unless there is an underlining issue.

    Answer by midnightmoma at 4:04 PM on Jun. 30, 2009

  • MAKE him stop. You are bigger and meaner.

    Answer by SusieD250 at 4:11 PM on Jun. 30, 2009

  • Take the toy from him and either give it to your youngest, or put it up.

    Answer by KennsWifey at 4:52 PM on Jun. 30, 2009

  • This is pretty common sibling behavior. As some one mentioned your bigger. Your the mom. Let your son know that every time he does this one of his toys is getting tossed. The hard thing for you is sticking to your word. It sounds like your oldest son isn't real familiar with consequences. 


    Answer by mistynights234 at 6:26 PM on Jun. 30, 2009

  • It sounds like your older son is bored. My son used to "aggravate" when he was bored. Pay attention to see when this happens to see if it when he is bored. If so, help him find something to do.  Here are some ideas

     Also check out the sibling rivalry books which might be helpful

    Talk to him eye to eye and let him know you do not like this behavior.  Tell him that you know he can be a "helper" to you and you need his help with the younger one.  Find opportunities for him to be able to help.  Then recognize and praise him (especially in front of others, brag about his help so that he can hear).


    Answer by momjs at 9:09 PM on Jun. 30, 2009

  • First, have you tried to sit down and talk to your five year old about it?

    Second, when he does it, do you discipline him at all? You could probably set up a pyramid of sorts. For example, first offense warning, second offense time out for a minimum of 5 minutes, third offense take something away - like grounding. The most important thing is to hold your ground.

    This might seem harsh or too severe, but everytime he does it to his brother, take away one of his favorite toys for at least the day and repeat each time explaining that if he wants to take his brothers toys, you will do the same and make him earn the toys back with behavior and playing correctly or helping with his brother. I hope this helps.

    Answer by janineasmith at 10:58 AM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • Time outs

    Answer by qtnfluffy at 1:54 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

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