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My husband of 4 years says the love he felt for me isnt the same

were currently seperated because he cheated,he denys it but he did.he wants to see the kids every other day,what kind of schedule should i give him???Its breaking my heart seeing him sooo much,how can i move on???I love him soooo much.He doesnt should i just let go?????

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:50 AM on Jul. 1, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • As hard as it might be...let him go. He cheated on you and has told you he doesn't love you the same, why waste your time? Good luck to you. Oh, and give him a schedule that works fo you and the kids!
    mamaada

    Answer by mamaada at 9:54 AM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • I am sorry that he has put you threw this:( You need to move on.Doesn't sound like he want to be with you any more..
    About visitation...I would tell him he can come and get the kids on the week ends.Friday night to sunday night. Untell the court says other wise.
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 10:06 AM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • I know your heart is breaking right now but time will ease the hurt and I agree it is time to move on. Remember and ending is a new beginning and you might meet someone who loves you with all his heart and will treat wonderful the way you deserve to be treated.


    I would not be bitter toward him don't give him the satisfaction or don't beg him to come back home and work things out, you will cry and have your moments but do it in private he doesn't deserve to see your tears. Also I would work out a schedule that is best for you and the kids as mamaada said, Good luck and be strong you will be alright at the end of the day.

    Angeleyez08

    Answer by Angeleyez08 at 10:06 AM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • You deserve better and yes, it's going to hurt letting go of the relationship,but time heals all wounds. No matter how hard you try, you can't make someone love you!!
    divah32

    Answer by divah32 at 10:26 AM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • Let go of him. He will just hurt you more even if you will get back together. His heart will be where he wants it to be. I am only saying this bec of my husband experiences. He told me that since the birth of 2nd son he wanted to get divorce and move out. His ex threated him that he will never see his two boys again so he agreed to move back in. He cheated on her repeatedly and treated the ex like a door mat. That is what is exact word bec he didn't love her anymore.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:26 AM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • It's easy for all of us to say let go of him, because it's not us that is in your situation. I don't know that you're really ready in your heart to move on just yet. If you think that there is something work holding on to, then I think you and he need to see a marriage counselor. After going for a few months, you will know what is the best thing...stay or move on....if he isn't willing to change his attitude towards you, hard as it may be, you'll need to move forward with your life. Not just for you, but also for your kids.
    Usually in a divorce, the parent that has primary custody or sole custody gets to keep the kids , and the other parent will have visitation rights. A court of law usually will give the visiting parent visits every other weekend, several weeks during the summer, and holidays are often shared or turns are taken. Example: You get them Thanksgiving, he gets them Christmas. Or, you get them until Christmas day
    lighthousemom3

    Answer by lighthousemom3 at 12:22 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • at 2pm, then he gets them for the rest of Christmas Break. Something to that affect. It would be better for you if you two could work out your own schedule with the kids, so it can fit into your lives better.
    Also, for shared custody, if one parent moves or whatever, the one parent has them 6 months of the year, and then the other parent has them 6 months of the year.
    Or, sometimes, one has them one week, one has them the next....to me that seems too hard on the children to go back and forth constantly. They need a stable environment to be able to grow and be nurtured in. Good Luck
    lighthousemom3

    Answer by lighthousemom3 at 12:25 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • I wouldnt want to be with anybody who wouldnt want to be with me. I would keep busy with work AND THE KIDS. MAKING PLANS AND DOING THINGS ,going out with friends. spending time with other family members some that you are close to, and others that you dont see very much tell him he could see the kids twice a week and every other week-end. that way if you see him less slowly it might be easier. for you. Maybe you could have friends or family members introduce you to some single mem out there. and maybe youll meet someone a little better for you.
    incarnita

    Answer by incarnita at 12:38 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • Love doesn't stay the same, so he may just be telling you that he loves you in a different way. Too many think that when the physical attraction begins to wane and the heart palpitations come less frequently, the love is gone. Don't know if that's where he is or not, but either way, I wouldn't let him go without a fight. This is the man you chose to be the father of your children, so I would do everything I could possibly do to keep him.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 12:46 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

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