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How much would this upset you, caught DH....

Dh and I took a few days off starting today and today being the only day sans kids, they are at school. We are NEVER alone. NEVER. This morning after dropping the kids off we took a nice hike, then came home, DH decided to take a nap, fine by me. I figured I'd take the alone time opportunity to mop the floors and get some cleaning done. I heard him get up and go to the bathroom and then I caught him, um, enjoying himself. I was on the deck and the idiot didn't close the bathroom blinds.

We are alone in the house, that NEVER happens. We never have sex. He has to go take care of himself while I'm literally in the next room? I'm hurt, would you be? I can't shake it.


Asked by Anonymous at 2:20 PM on Jul. 1, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (12)
  • id be a little hurt too. my hubby did that to me too...just not the exact same situtation, i was laying in bed watching tv and he went to the bathroom instead of coming to me. make it a point to have sex....after the kids are asleep....lock your door and enjoy some time. or send them to a relatives on a friday or saturday and do it that way....

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:26 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • It's probably habit for him if you guys never have sex. I'd suggest maybe getting into some sex therapy. It's worked wonders for my husband and I.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:21 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • The reason we never have sex is because the kids are always around and the little one is in our bed most nights. Today we had the entire house to ourselves.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:24 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • put the little one in his bed bed after he falls asleep. then you have a little time with eachother

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:26 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • LOL...sorry...don't mean to laugh but being caught red-handed like that is funny.Yeah. I'd be hurt and peeved a lil too. Maybe when he said he wanted to lay down for a nap what he really wanted was for you to come join him,naked and get funky.He probably assumed scince you were busy mopping the floors he would just take care of himself rather than bother you.Maybe he thought if he left the door open and you caught him you'd be so turned on that you would finish the job for him,lol. Men think weird...I guess you gotta try to think like them sometimes(which is only hard if you think too deep,lol).March in there and tell him it's your turn to get off and if he can do the job for himself...well, he can do the job for you too!

    Answer by kimberlyinberea at 2:33 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • you should have walked in there & asked him if he needed help w/ that.

    I understand why your hurt, but for some reason he felt uncomfortable coming to you. Maybe he assumes you would not want to & does not want to take the risk of looking stupid. Maybe make it a point to tell him that you have been horny a lot lately.....I'm sure if you tell him that he would stop wacking himself off.

    Answer by samurai_chica at 2:45 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • I would be a little upset too! But you shouldnt make excuses for not having sex, it truly is a part of your relationship and if your lacking in that area than your lacking in other areas. You should want to have sex with him, I am not saying every night but way more than "never"!!! He is a man and he has needs as well as you do too!

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:46 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • I really wouldn't be upset. From what I have learned from being married is it's a diff feeling for them. Just talk to him about it.


    Answer by Mommyof3_6_8_13 at 6:54 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • I would be upset with myself for thinking it would be better to clean then go follow him into bed. What else did you expect him to do?

    Answer by Chrissy629 at 8:22 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • I don't blame him for jerking off if you never have sex with him.

    Having kids around the house is no excuse. Get freaky with each other during the day while the kids watch TV. Do a nooner. If the kid's in your bed at night, sneak out for some nookie in the laundry room. Take a bath/shower together. The opportunities are there. It's really not that hard.

    Were you just expecting him to seduce you out of nowhere that day? If he's used to not having sex with you, he probably didn't even want to bother trying out of fear of rejection.

    How often do you two have sex? Enthusiastically?
    How often do you initiate? Enthusiastically?

    Answer by Mousuke at 9:50 PM on Jul. 1, 2009