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I think I wanna give up...

I feel i wanna give up. Im tired of doing all this alone without my babys dad, i love him so so much but he dont want me.. its crazy. But this is so so so so so hard for me, im 16 and 9wks pregnant and its the hardest thing in the world to do by myself i think. People tell me dont give up on the baby but give up on the babys dad because if he dont want you then ya gotta get ovr it itss hard tho. All im happy bout is he does wanna be in my childs life. i need help im suffering here. lol any advice?

 
wishingmommy1

Asked by wishingmommy1 at 10:00 PM on Jul. 1, 2009 in Pregnancy

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This question is closed.
Answers (17)
  • it will be hard without him. but it could be harder with him.. i know that makes no sense right now but trust me being with the daddy is sometimes alot harder.. i know you are hurt, but you have a baby that needs you. and this may sound bad to some, but you have someone now that will never leave you, that will love you always no matter what you say or do, how you look . and that person needs you! if the daddy is in his/her life than thats great. but you have to look at it like this. if he would leave you while you are pregnant, and not be there to help you threw all that you will go threw, than you do not need him..16 is a young age to go threw this alone, trust me i did it! i hope you have a good support system. if it wasnt for my family and friends i dont know what i would have done!!! and if you ever just want to chat,,, look me up!
    good luck lil ma!
    jannaboo

    Answer by jannaboo at 10:11 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • you need to do what you think is best for you and the baby. if you decided to keep the baby then giving up isn't an option hun. i'm sure you have lots of family and friends that are there to support you and your baby! you don't always have to have the dad around. i raised both of my babies alone while my husband was at war, sure he always comes back after a year of being deployed, but he's gone so much on training and such that most of the time i feel like i'm a single mom.
    i know it's not the same as being a single mom period. but don't give up sweetie, i know you're very young and things might be overwhelming right now but it'll get better :o)
    trisandkksmom

    Answer by trisandkksmom at 10:07 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • Maybe you shouldn't have gotten pregnant so young with someone that wasn't going to stick around to be with you. It's good that he "says" he'll be there for the baby, but honestly a lot of guys can't handle it and he'll probably visit once every few months then stop.

    Don't worry so much about him, he has some growing up to do and you don't have time to try and keep him around. You have some growing up to do as well.
    ours

    Answer by ours at 10:07 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • Don't know what you mean by give up, but don't do anything to hurt yourself or the baby. If you want to give up the baby there are A LOT of couples out there who want a baby and could care for it if you feel you cannot. If you want to keep the baby, get some supports in place...parents, freinds, counselors, etc. I wish i could tell you it gets easier, but that would not be honest. i've been a single mom before and it's hard ( i also did it at 33 with a house, my own business, and a fabulous supportive family). If the babies dad doesn't want to be there now, then he's not responisble and more than likely won't be there for the hard stuff.
    citymama707

    Answer by citymama707 at 10:09 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • @ours and who are you to judge her??? i'm not a fan of teenage girls getting pregnant either but at least she didn't chose the easy way out, getting "rid" of her baby!!!! and uhm, to tell a 16yr old that she's got some growing up to do doesn't sound very "grown up" either... kind of obvious that she's not grown up yet, don't you think?
    trisandkksmom

    Answer by trisandkksmom at 10:12 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • "Maybe you shouldn't have gotten pregnant so young with someone that wasn't going to stick around to be with you. It's good that he "says" he'll be there for the baby, but honestly a lot of guys can't handle it and he'll probably visit once every few months then stop."

    Wow, way to be negative about the situation when the poor girl is obviously already upset as it is.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:13 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • Maybe you shouldn't have gotten pregnant so young with someone that wasn't going to stick around to be with you. It's good that he "says" he'll be there for the baby, but honestly a lot of guys can't handle it and he'll probably visit once every few months then stop.

    Don't worry so much about him, he has some growing up to do and you don't have time to try and keep him around. You have some growing up to do as well.

    Don't listen to this answer or any other answer that puts you down!!! You stay strong for your baby! I know it's hard but their so worth it! people who are mean and nasty like that just are judgemental freaks who are here to make your life harder. Stay strong! I'm 20 and pregnant with my second so I know it's hard to be a young mom. i'm married to their dad but it's still not easy cause he works during the day so It's like I'm a single mom then. Just know when the baby comes he or she will make you smile..ct
    Heidikans

    Answer by Heidikans at 10:21 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • and that it will totally be worth it in the end. People who tell you you shouldn't have gotten pregnant are stupid and like I said judgemental!!! good luck and I'm here for anything I can help with!!
    Heidikans

    Answer by Heidikans at 10:22 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • I'm giving her the best advice that she could get. I got pregnant and was worried about anything and everything until my mom set me down and told me what was most important, growing up for my baby. I went from living in my husband's house with no air, job, or money to owning at house, saving up more than enough money for my baby and a new car. There's a lot that can be done in those ten months, and I'm glad my mom made me realize what was important.

    And plus, I am just not in the best mood to sugar coat things tonight. At least I'm sending her in the right direction. Baby daddy drama is not the most important thing right now even though she thinks that it is.
    ours

    Answer by ours at 10:34 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • Oh and I'm the only one of my friends that got pregnant young and had the father of their baby stick around. I'd rather someone be honest with me than anything else. I'm sorry if it was too negative for you hun, and I know it's too late to turn back now and I AM glad that you're keeping the baby. It's just that I wish people would be more careful with who they have sex with. It's more than a good time and like I said, you DO have a lot of growing up to do now for your baby.
    ours

    Answer by ours at 10:37 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

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