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Would you say reading Cosmo sex stories, romance novels, sex scenes in motion pictures to see a star nude is cheating?

I mean, it seems like some people think if you even mentally take an interest in anything remotley sexual for even a second you are unfaithful.

I just see a lot of posts that say thoughts turn into actions and it's cheating if you think it. If so than haven't we all cheated at one time in our relationship? I have a hard time believing that every man has never silently been a little sexually attracted to someone other than his wife for just a second, and that goes for women too. If we base it on this are our marriages in trouble? I just think it's a bit much....

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:46 PM on Jul. 1, 2009 in Just for Fun

Answers (12)
  • No I don't think it is cheating. Tons of men watch porn and although I would probably be pissed if I caught my fiance watching it, I wouldn't consider it cheating. Cheating, at least in my opinion, is having a physcial or emotional relationship with another ACTUAL person. Looking at your fav celeb naked in a movie or magazine isn't creating a relationship with them.

    Answer by Ash9724 at 10:49 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • I agree with PP. My DH looks at porn but usually only when im on my period. And i find some actors hot and finds actresses hot. I dont see it as cheating.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:52 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • I wouldn't say any of those things are cheating. But then again I watch porno's with my husband. We have a very open communication when it comes to sexual things.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:52 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • I think cheating only covers physical or emotional attention toward or from another person. Thinking it is not cheating. I think a kiss on the cheek from your old best friend in high school, is not cheating. Talking on the phone to someone that you could be attracted to other than your spouse is not cheating. Now, if there is innocent flirting, that isn't cheating yet. If you tell someone else that you love them or you wish you could be with them, or you kiss someone else with feeling or passion, then you are cheating. Understand what I mean? I will actually point out good looking women to my husband from time to time.

    Answer by Mom1Stepmom1 at 10:53 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • I don't think it is considered cheating at all!!! As far as my relationship goes we have no trust issues at all.. and i think that has a lot to do with being so open about things. He is aloud to watch porn if he feels like it, hey it may give him some good ideas and they could benefit me :) Also if we are out, we have no problems telling each other if someone that is walking by is attractive. It just doesn't phase us at all. We know we love each other, and we don't want to have a relationship with anyone else. But it doesn't mean we can't be attracted to other people. Life would just be to boring if you couldn't look at any hot men out there. you can look you just can't touch!! :) Out sides sources help to make relationships more fun and exciting. So that is just ridiculous to me... but hey that's just me!!

    Answer by ashjacks4 at 10:53 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • OP here, I feel the same way. I don't see how something is cheating as long as both parties are okay with it. I have tried a few things with my husband and it didn't change our relationship for the worst. It actually made it better. When we watch porn it's to relate to the situation, which very much turns us on, not to wish we were having sex with Big Breasted Bonnie and in love with her. Not to confused with 3 ways or anything like that.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:55 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • Lol... I guess I would be upset if I found out my husband wanted to have sex with the person he was reading about/looking at, but that's not how it is for us. Both of us like to read and look at sexual material. It's fun and it builds tension. But it makes us want EACH OTHER. I'd be a big fat liar if I said I didn't notice attractive men, and he'd be a big fat liar if he said he didn't notice attractive women. It's human nature. I don't think it's cheating at all. You must be hanging out in a VERY conservative group :p

    Answer by Ati_13 at 11:15 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • No, none of that is cheating.

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 11:32 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • To lust after someone is to commit yes, I think it's cheating.

    Answer by BethTTC at 11:36 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • Looking and thinking are very different than doing and acting. As long as it doesn't become action (unless both parties are ok with it, but the world can be pretty vanilla ya know) then it's not cheating. If it were I'd be cheating on my SO right now. My favorite book series has a decent amount of sex in it and I totally swoon over the main love interest.

    Answer by nerdyma7 at 2:20 AM on Jul. 2, 2009

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