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getting ready to leave him

So my husband is not the man i married, he does not work and always complaine about having to "babysit" our son while I am in work o while i'm in class(I work and go to school full time). On top of this he does not do ANY work around the house and has the audacity to call me a bitch or a cunt EVERY day because we argue. I have decided this is not the type of environment that I want to raise our son in and I have begun looking at daycares and I have talked to the court and they will provide me with a lawyer at little or no cost because of my low income and student status. I am sure that i will win custody of our son as my husband has a felony and will not have a home, job, or car (i payed for all of these). My question is, are there any other women who went through this and is it normal to feel scared/unsure of your future? This is so difficult and if anyone has any words or wisdom I would really appreciate it.

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Asked by Anonymous at 10:59 PM on Jul. 1, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (19)
  • I dont but wanted to say good luck and I'll pray for you.

    Answer by MommyLee08 at 11:02 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • you payed for them all but are they in both of your names? and if they are and your married 50/50 it will be half his

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:05 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • We rent a house and everything that i paid for i bought before we were married and they are in my name only.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:09 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • so the lease is solely in your name? and you hate the father of your child that much to leave him in the cold with nothing?? seems a little heartless no matter what hes done.. i could never throw the father of my child with nothing into the street

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:15 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • There is no lease because the landlord is a friend of mine, and the reason i have decided to leave him is that 3 days ago he threw hot food on me, and a phone book while yelling at me with my son screaming the whole time. He breaks things around our house at least once a week and has punched 2 holes in the wall. Today he called our son a fucking jerk that he could not stand to be around AND he has been cheating on me. I was looking for some words of encouragement here not some snotty woman trying to make me feel bad for leaving my abusive husband.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:19 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • I haven't been in a situation like this, but a "man" , and I use this term loosely, like that deserves nothing. How can he say he's "babysitting" his own child? As far as I knew that was considered being a parent. And the verbal abuse, ugh don't get me started. Good for you getting out of that situation hon. Good luck!

    Answer by KareemsMami at 11:21 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • Yes... I have BTDT!!

    I took my three kids and started over almost three years ago. Yes, I was scared and it was a hard step to take, but we are SO much better off without my ex!! He was a lot like yours... wouldn't work, stayed drunk, was verbally and physically abusive.... He was NOT a good example for my kids and I couldn't let him abuse me any more in front of them. Abuse, whether verbal or physical is never good for children to have to deal with!!

    It sounds like you are on the right track!! Please ignore the anon above that obviously has no clue what kind of situation you are in! You are only putting your son's needs first, and that is what is most important right now!!

    You are more than welcome to private message me anytime you need some encouragement!!


    Answer by VeronicaLee at 11:26 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • I just saw your 11:19 post. For some reason it wasn't there when I posted a minute ago... please private message me, and I will give you some links that may be helpful to you....

    ((Big Hugs)) to you....

    Answer by VeronicaLee at 11:29 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • every one here: has also BTDT and you won't get bashed, I promise!!


    Answer by VeronicaLee at 11:39 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

  • I'm sure shes not hearless and doesn't want to leave him with nothing, i think she just feels fed up and fusterated. I'm not married to my sons dad but we were together for 2 years until last week. he just wasn't helping. He did work, but when i asked him to watch our son for only an hour, he would look at it as a chore or a favor that id owe him for. I am a fulltime student about to graduate and i dont have a job. He also has a felony and couldn't ever lose his job. He's an alcoholic, hopefully your isn't but that oculd be a problem too. you shouldn't ever be called a cunt or a bitch, calling a girl a cunt is belittling her and treating her like shes just a piece or ass, a bitch, a slave, and its not right, he used to call me that constantly. Im going through the same thing in the respect that i broke up with him, and now hes saying hes getting a res. order. so in turn to piss off i was going to get one too, and realized cont

    Answer by MickeysMom19 at 11:53 PM on Jul. 1, 2009

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