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How can I be nice when I have to repeatedly tell people not to do that?

I have a 5 month old baby boy. I get frustrated when I have to tell people over and over that I don't want my son to "try" new foods like chips, cheese or candy, but some people are so persistent. Also, to hold him tight because he likes to jump backwards and squirm. There have been so many times when people are holding him facing them and he flies backwards. Plus they play too rough with him. This includes my husband. I'm sorry, but when it comes to my son I don't take any chances and I hate that I have to constantly remind adults to be careful or not to feed him table food. I also hate that they roll their eyes and say some stupid remarks such as "He's OK." or "You're just a 1st time Mom you wont even care with your next kid."

I am tired of being nice and about rip some heads off! What should I do to prevent that?

 
crystal1480

Asked by crystal1480 at 8:25 PM on Jul. 2, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 1 (3 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • "I can't imagine any reasonable adult giving a 5 month old baby chips, however, bites of soft table food here and there really won't hurt a thing. And you will loosen up with your next child, you have to remember, they are your inlaws because they raised your husband, and I presume he is happy and healthy. Relax Mom, experience speaks louder than degrees or books."

    Other people having this attitude IS the problem. Yes, bits of some table food can hurt (care to read about my baby vomiting all night? that was a soft bit of table food). People need to learn to listen and respect other people's rules about THEIR children. I've had it with other people telling me what will or won't hurt my own kids. I'll trust my doctor, not the overweight inlaw with diabetes and heart problems who claims her bacon munching two month old granddaughter is just fine.
    apexmommy

    Answer by apexmommy at 11:10 PM on Jul. 2, 2009

  • That used to drive me nutty, too. My husband caught on that he shouldn't be rough with a little baby, that the baby wasn't a toy or football. But the food thing was always a bone of contention between myself and the in-laws. Continue to be firm and polite, and definite.
    Bmat

    Answer by Bmat at 8:29 PM on Jul. 2, 2009

  • I take my child back when people feed her food she can't have. She was fed birthday cake (nine months old) this weekend, and she vomited all night, bright red. It was awful. I didn't notice she was being fed cake, and I can't believe I have to ask people not to do it.

    If it happens with the same people, you can jokingly say "no, you can't hold him, you keep dropping him! / feeding him crap!" They might get the message.
    apexmommy

    Answer by apexmommy at 8:30 PM on Jul. 2, 2009

  • I think you should rip some heads off lol
    I'm sorry it's not funny but I know what you mean
    You should just tell them in a voice like you mean it and say "Yes I'm well aware that I'm a first time mom, and as a mom I have my own rule on how I want my baby fed, held, etc so I would apreciate it if you would just do what I ask since he is my baby and I'm his moma"
    looovemybabies

    Answer by looovemybabies at 8:33 PM on Jul. 2, 2009

  • I can't imagine any reasonable adult giving a 5 month old baby chips, however, bites of soft table food here and there really won't hurt a thing. And you will loosen up with your next child, you have to remember, they are your inlaws because they raised your husband, and I presume he is happy and healthy. Relax Mom, experience speaks louder than degrees or books.
    kustomkrochet

    Answer by kustomkrochet at 8:34 PM on Jul. 2, 2009

  • This usually works for me, I just tell them that if it's their kid they can do what they want, but it's mine and if they can't respect my decisions then they can just go away. My ex MIL used to drive me nuts with this stuff, telling me what I should or shouldn't do because she had 3 boys and that makes her the expert. HEHE, mind you, she didn't get the hint, so I just flat out told her that I've met all her boys and her advice is HORRIBLE, look how they turned out! LOL She stopped! :)
    I also had this little old lady offer some advice and bit her head off too. Sometimes you just have to.
    TheDiva320

    Answer by TheDiva320 at 8:37 PM on Jul. 2, 2009

  • Anytime I have to tell someone not to feed my son something or don't do something with him I take him away. I can't stand it! I am the mommy. THATS IT! I am so sick of explaining myself, and dealing with their "well I had kids too" I honestly don't care. your kids weren't mine and mine aren't yours. So I just take him. If they want to ask why then I will explain. But I don't budge. And I guarantee I will do the same with the child I am currently carrying. It wont change with how many I have.

    LucasMama08

    Answer by LucasMama08 at 8:49 PM on Jul. 2, 2009

  • You shouldn't be nice... anyone who suggests feeding chips or candy to a 5 months old is a f-ing idiot whom I would NOT trust with my kid! It's your child. It doesn't matter if you're a 1st time mom -- my mother tried to pull that out a few times (though never for anything as extreme as what you said), but it turns out, with my second daughter I'm just as concerned for her safety. Most people don't want any of their kids, even their 10th, to DIE!
    EmilySusan

    Answer by EmilySusan at 8:55 PM on Jul. 2, 2009

  • Ugh, I HATE that. Next time, say "well, unfortunatley this is MY child, and if you can't respect that, you can't hold him" and take him back.

    Don't feel bad at ALL. Chips and candy can cause your child lifelong intestinal issues, allergies, and not to mention the immediate effects possible diarrhea/gas/constipation/bloating/upset tummy.

    Idiots!!!!
    Arkaidy

    Answer by Arkaidy at 9:15 PM on Jul. 2, 2009

  • I get the food part...but the dad plays to rough? Babies are remarkably resilient, they are made that way for a reason, so unless he is being thrown around like a football or they are holding him with only one hand and the other hand on his collar.....you should probably relax, you and the people around you will enjoy the baby better.
    luckysevenwow

    Answer by luckysevenwow at 9:27 PM on Jul. 2, 2009

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