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mother in law..............

I have always liked my soon to be MIL, we get along great.. the other day she called me with an odd request. she wants to be in the delivery room when i have the baby. well her exact words was "i am going to be in there when you have it so i will record it". OK i said i like her and we get along.. but I do not want her in the room when i deliver. where i am from it can only be two people in the room and that would mean that MY mother couldnt be in there. I am not that comfortable to her. and i want my mom there with me.. how do i tell her without pissing her off. she is kind of a sensitive person.. and i do not want 'bad blood' with her.

please help

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jannaboo

Asked by jannaboo at 1:12 AM on Jul. 3, 2009 in Pregnancy

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (14)
  • Just say hey I found out that I can only have 2 ppl in the delivery room and Ive always wanted my mom to be there and my fiance so Im sorry unless the hospital will make the exception Im not gonna have my mom or fiance sit out because Its what I want...
    Dom123123

    Answer by Dom123123 at 1:16 AM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • Just tell her you can only have 2 people present at the time and you already have your mom and husband. Or have your hubby explain to her the situation. Congrats btw.
    sailfishmommy

    Answer by sailfishmommy at 1:17 AM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • Umm...this would be really easy for me. Simply explain to her that you want the father of the baby (obviously) and your mother in the room. Tell her she's welcome to film all she wants afterwards, but that she will not be in their during delivery. This is one of those times in your life where you deserve to be completely comfortable and should have things exactly as YOU want them. I think it's rude of her to even suggest it like that without being asked. I don't care if 100 people were allowed in the room, my MIL would not be in there. Explain that you need your own mother...after all, SHE have birth to YOU..Why wouldn't she deserve to be there? If your MIL even remotely doesn't understand this, something is wrong with her and I wouldn't care at all what she thought. You have to tell her and don't be afraid...there is NOTHING wrong with the way you want things.
    StefanieN84

    Answer by StefanieN84 at 1:20 AM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • I'm sorry but I hate these questions! How is it fair to have your Mother in the room but not his? Did you forget that if it weren't for her, you wouldn't have the Husband or baby you have. I understand feeling uncomfortable with having your MIL in there but can't she at least stand by your head or come in at the very end?? It just causes problems that are unnecessary to me and affect things in the future. And if one Mom can't be in the room the other shouldn't be allowed to.

    mommymine3

    Answer by mommymine3 at 1:23 AM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • I'm sorry but I hate these questions! How is it fair to have your Mother in the room but not his? Did you forget that if it weren't for her, you wouldn't have the Husband or baby you have. I understand feeling uncomfortable with having your MIL in there but can't she at least stand by your head or come in at the very end?? It just causes problems that are unnecessary to me and affect things in the future. And if one Mom can't be in the room the other shouldn't be allowed to.

    What? So she shouldn't have her mother in the room? That is absolutely stupid! Wtf? Most retarded opinion I've ever heard.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:26 AM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • Okay Anon 1:26

    What I said was if one can't be in there the other shouldn't be allowed either. How is that fair? She's not giving birth to HER child she's giving birth to THEIR child!
    mommymine3

    Answer by mommymine3 at 1:30 AM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • I'm sorry, but I agree with Anon 1:26. She's GIVING BIRTH...she deserves to have her CHOICE. Yea, that's a real smart solution,since she can only have 2 people, just have NO ONE! Is she supposed to exclude her husband? Or her own mother? I know..since you think both mothers can be in there, tell the husband he has to wait outside. :rolls eyes:
    StefanieN84

    Answer by StefanieN84 at 1:30 AM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • Just tell her no. It's your right.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:38 AM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • Explain to her the hospital policies and tell her your decision. I don't agree with mommymine. you shouldnt have to be uncomfy.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:41 AM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • I'm in a similiar situation. I want my mom in the room but not hte MIL. mostly because I know she'll drive me crazy the whole time. I haven't yet told her I don't want her in there. But at this point I'm thinking about making just my hubby and I to avoid any problems. Its a sucky situation! But you really need to just be honest with her. It's your baby and your choice. its going to be a stressful enough time without unwanted people making things worse.
    jedwards2009

    Answer by jedwards2009 at 2:10 AM on Jul. 3, 2009

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