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Are comfort zones really that bad?

Okay, so to make things a little more clear for everyone. I recently moved to the middle of the desert in CA from TN so that I could be with my husband. My daughter is due in September yet I am already starting to have early labor pains and contractions which worries me because I was a preemie and I have a higher risk of delivering early. My husband gets upset that I stay at the apartment all the time and don't get out but it's really hot out here and my car's a/c is messed up which makes getting out even worse. Plus, I don't know anyone out here and I feel completely out of my comfort zone that I had at home where I hung out with the same people that I have hung out with since I was like 5. Is it really that wrong for me to have that comfort zone even though I have left my hometown?

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ChasityDawn

Asked by ChasityDawn at 5:18 AM on Jul. 3, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (4)
  • Maybe if you get confirmation from your doc, you could tell him that docs ordered me to stay in the house. You have to think about the baby not your confort zone just yet. Plus thats a big move, I would know Im getting ready to move to TN from CA. haha
    Thaifalung20

    Answer by Thaifalung20 at 5:28 AM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • I'm sorry to tell you this, but you're going to have to get out and meet people. Yes you're out of your comfort zone, and yes it will feel weird at first, but that is what you have to do when you move around a lot.

    Search on the internet for groups of women in your area who share your interests or maybe are having babies themselves maybe even strike up a conversation with someone in the doctor's office who is also pregnant. Take up every offer to hang out with other people. If you don't, this life will be very lonely.

    Last year I did one of DH's soldiers taxes for him. He was supposed to bring his new wife over, but she refused to leave the house. She refused to meet anyone. We even cooked for them. I found it very odd.

    And as far as the contractions and early labor go, talk to your doctor. Maybe they'll limit your activity or something. You may have to do more sitting than walking for the next 3 months.
    Cavalrybaby02

    Answer by Cavalrybaby02 at 7:02 AM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • Dont push yourself. Right now it is freakin hot and no having a comfort zone is not bad. You need to allow yourself time to transition. BUT part of making the transition easier would be to make a couple new friends. You can go to meetup.com and find moms groups. I had never done that before and when I moved to Vegas in Apr, someone referred me to it and I found a group of moms. Some mornings I HAVE to push myself to go to the playdates, but I always come home feeling good. So even if you can get out twice a month before you start to feel comfortable again then at least try. Its hard moving like that, I move around so much and I hate it and it always takes me a couple months to adjust. Being pregnant just adds to it, it will get better though.
    vivianasmom

    Answer by vivianasmom at 8:03 AM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • I lived out in the desert in CA for years. It's too doggone hot in the summer especially to be out. The heat killed my dad out there (he had a bad heart though). You could get dehydrated or something that could harm your child. Tell dad to leave you be. Moving is not always easy. I hated leaving my comfort zone. I've still never created another one so I go back home as much as I can. Talk with your doctor. Practice what you'd do in case the baby comes early and hubby's not around. Do not hesitate to call an ambulance or at the very least a taxi if you need a way to the hospital. I'd try taking Lamaze classes to help you stay in control during labor. It helps you stay calm when things don't always go the way they should.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:22 AM on Jul. 3, 2009

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