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who do you blame for this discipline?

on dr. phil today -- special needs kids being put in timeouts that are unsafe ... umm i blame the parents! the 1st girl is locked in a room bc she wont cooperate .. HELLO YOU , THE PARENTS , PUT HER IN A SCHOOL! KEEP HER HOME! ... shes autistic , so does that mean she doesnt need a time out? NO WAYY!!! this type of discipline , who do you blame? the teachers for doing it , or the parents for putting their kids in school?

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Asked by Anonymous at 3:07 PM on Jul. 3, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (18)
  • to me, a time out does not constitute being locked in a room, and if any teacher did that to my child whether she was uncooperative or not they would have a lawsuit on their hands.

    Now, just because a child is autistic does NOT mean that they can't go to school. I think that they (the parents) should perhaps find a more appropriate program for their child, but not just keep the child home because she is hard to deal with.

    Answer by CarolynBarnett at 3:11 PM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • There are appropriate ways to disipline and locking them in the room is NOT one of them.

    Its the teachers who have a lack of education on this topic.

    And I am a teacher. If you have a child who is autistic in your room, you need to talk openly with the parents and administration about appropriate disipline and FOLLOW that guideline. You also need to LEARN, by reading and educating yourself on how best to teach your student...its your job!!!

    Answer by mom2twobabes at 3:12 PM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • Im watching this one as well , i just seen on the "comming up" part the mother said "i should have stepped in" obviously! idiot! ... I know if i was unfortunate enough to have a child like this or any 'needy' child ... i wouldnt keep them home w/ me , but w/ someone lol ... i dont want any other kids to lose out bc of my mistakes , you know?

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:12 PM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • Are you kidding me?! You think that parents of special needs children should just keep them home? A. Unless you're providing homeschooling, that's illegal. B. Most parents do not having the training needed to teach severely autistic children C. Parents do not have the therapeutic resources needed for these children's education. Seriously, you think that autistic children shouldn't be sent to school? I can hardly wrap my mind around that. I have a special needs child and work in special needs classes while I finish up my Masters of Arts in Teaching. This child probably shouldn't be in a general ed class, but it is certainly not the parents fault for sending the child to school.

    Answer by toriandgrace at 3:26 PM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • I work in a class for special needs high school students. We do have a time out room and it does get used. Sometimes a time out is the only effective, I hate to say discipline, but discipline for a student who is having an outburst. Obviously we try to prevent it from getting to that point, but it happens. We don't lock them in there, the door has no lock, but we will have them by themselves, give them a couple minutes alone to collet themselves and then we will go in and have a conversation about what happened and better ways to react, etc. We also use the room for kids who may just need to have a few minutes of quiet to cope. We have almost 80 people between students and staff in our area, so sometimes some kids need to get away from the noise and people.

    Answer by canadianmom1974 at 3:39 PM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • Toriandgrace : if the parents aren't able to teach em don't have em! Or send them to a school for them!!

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:51 PM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • I just seen the last story on dr phil about the specail ed boy who got bullied and shot hisself ; his only friends,special ed too , that shows you right there he should have been in a school for those kids,not regular kids. Parents know when they send those kids they're going to get picked on..and if you still send them,its the parents fault when something happens!

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:54 PM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • You can't know ahead that your child will be a special needs child. Also, it is not always up to the parents whether their child attends a regular school or a special autistic school. That child should never have been treated that way, whether in a regular school or not. Most school districts do not bus children to special schools, but rather, put these children in a self contained room at a regular elementary school. How old are your children OP, because you seem to know little or nothing about school systems? I pray that you NEVER have a special needs child.

    Answer by toriandgrace at 3:58 PM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • I don't know enough about the condition to comment however, I have a disorder where that if I were put in a room away from others I wouldn't consider it punishment. I personally do better in a room alone. So let's not jump the gun and throw stones just yet. Isolation isn't a horrible thing for some. If she was kicking and screaming and traumatized by it then that's one thing but if she doesn't like being around others then she should be ok. Not sure I'd be locking the door bc of a fire hazard but the isolation isn't always bad. I have one child who thinks it's more of a punishment to be in the classroom with others and would prefer to be put in another room alone. Let's not judge others by what might be right for us.

    Answer by admckenzie at 4:07 PM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • So are you saying that Special Needs kids should not be in school? We all run the risk of people in authority not doing right by our children be it at school, church, camp or someone's house. I do not think that is a reason not to send a child to school Using your line of thinking, the kids should never be out of your sight. I am not sure if you are anti-school or anti-special needs kids in school or where you are going with this.

    Answer by teampalmer4 at 4:57 PM on Jul. 3, 2009

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