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I'm a little lost

I'm 27 weeks pregnant and I moved far far away from my family to live with the father of my child. I usually find myself feeling resentful towards him for various reasons and don't know what to do to feel otherwise I talk to him about it but he just thinks im spoiled some of the reasons i feel so depressed are that he never mentions marriage because he says we are not ready for it and i feel like i know hes the one we have been together 2 years and know each other very well or sometimes i cant help ask stupid questions like if he thinks im going to be a good mother and he says his mom is a better mother than i will be im just having so many doubts and feel so alone

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chickenandpep

Asked by chickenandpep at 5:54 PM on Jul. 3, 2009 in Pregnancy

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Answers (6)
  • Its ok, My sister, was the same way as you are! Honey Everything will be ok, as soon as you pop out that bundle of joy, and as soon as that childs father sees how motherly, and good of a mom you are towards the baby everything will change trust me, and about your boyfriend (men) Are (men).,,. there never ready,,, lool its normal... I wish you joy,, and Luck!!!!
    BabyStrawberry

    Answer by BabyStrawberry at 6:07 PM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • wow, I can understand saying that his mom was a great mother, but he shouldn't be diminishing you like that. You might just want to come out and tell him that you are feeling vulnerable and hormonal because of the pregnancy and miss your family because they are so far away. I would also point out that you need his support right now, not his negativity. Not sure what to say about the marriage thing though, but my opinion is that he will either come around or not. It's up to you whether or not you want to wait for that to happen
    rhianna1708

    Answer by rhianna1708 at 6:08 PM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • yeah uh i think that was super effed up what he said. he shouldnt be saying anything to you that doesnt build you up, especially in the emotional state youre in. im sure things will be much much better when you're not prego anymore cuz im tellin you half the time i can hardly stand the sight of my husband let alone hear him talk lol but its not like that befor or after teh pregnancies. but still HE doesnt have any excuse to be putting you down like that. be around people who are going to add to your life. good luck! =)
    disheveled

    Answer by disheveled at 7:30 PM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • Honestly, I know you love him, but he needs to understand that you're going to be a first time mother (right?), and you need him to be there for you. Instead he's telling you that you're spoiled and that his mom is a better mother than you'll ever be.

    Honey, you don't need that BS. Sit there and talk to him about how you're feeling, like honestly, not cutting corners or beating around the bush. be straight forward and honest with him. And if he continues to act this way, you need to think about your mental health. Maybe it would be better if you moved back home for a little bit.

    I know you love him, but if he makes you feel like crap all the time, how do you expect to take care of your baby when you're depressed? All you'll want to do is lay in bed. And instead of trying to help you, he'll probably yell at you and call you names.
    AmandaMarie821

    Answer by AmandaMarie821 at 8:05 PM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • This is kinda bad,but I trust you all.I was with the father of my children for only 2 months when WE became pregnant. He was actually overjoyed. He called all his relatives and stuff and friends.Throughout the pregnancy of the first one,we had a couple moments,but these only occurred when he was drunk ,because at times when Ken's drunk he tends to get a little overspoken.Occasionally I'd get upset and couldn't stop crying.When he was sober he was a prince.He had a friend at his workplace that told him to always say,"Yes dear" to a pregnant woman.(this is now our little joke even now after I'm done having babies)
    So when he had his son he was a big help for the first couple months.
    Was a little upset(and later told him)with the response of being pregnant with a 2nd one.Thought I'd surprise him over the phone.His reply,"Well that's what you wanted,isn't it?"No calling all his friends excited this time.
    maidmomma

    Answer by maidmomma at 8:46 AM on Jul. 16, 2009

  • He did call his mother.I finally told him,"You know you were a little more excited with the first one,this time you didn't really act the same."Also when I brought her home (baby #2) he didn't really switch places as much as he did with Jacob.(we tag teamed it-I got to sleep more with the first one)He looked at me like I was crazy when I had to get ready for work when I went back from maternity and she woke up.(worked morning shift those days)
    Now she IS dadda's girl.I occasionally remind him he wasn't all too excited about her at first.Don't take any of this wrong,he is a good daddy.
    maidmomma

    Answer by maidmomma at 8:53 AM on Jul. 16, 2009

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