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What do I do?

My boyfreind doesnt have a job right now I had to file child support I am still so in love with him but hes not taking as much responsibility as he should be our daughter is 16 months old he loves her to death hes a great dad and helps out when hes needed and even offers but we have another baby due in september ive heard from freinds that hes been out and that hes been doing drugs he went to a concert today that we were supposed to go to together but instead he left me at home pregnant with a kidney infection in pain running a fever and with a 16 month old baby who is teething and a earache today has been the worst day i could have ever expected.
Anyway should i break up with him and hope he realizes what he needs to do or should I give him another chance because he is being a great dad but just not financialy supporting us and we have a close to 2000 bill for the new baby that has to be paid at the end of the month.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:43 PM on Jul. 3, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • Drugs would be deal-breaker with me. He also needs to be paying at least child-support. It sounds to me as though it is time for you to make a better life for yourself and your children.
    Bmat

    Answer by Bmat at 10:45 PM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • well to me it sounds like you're more leaning towards breaking up with him. he can still be a great dad even if you aren't together. but if he left you at home, pregnant and sick w/a 16 month old to take care of alone, so he could go out and have fun. not exactly what i would call good boyfriend material, and you had to file for child support and your still together? whats that tell you?
    vabchmommy

    Answer by vabchmommy at 10:46 PM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • he sounds like a real winner, yeah I'd stay and be treated like that (that is sarcasm) You know he's not going to change. Get out and get medicaid and help from the state until he decides to grow up
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:50 PM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • You should not be with someone that is doing drugs. That is an issue for both you and your children. Get out and get the help you need. Pray that he can get himself straightened out so that you guys can make a decent home for your children. grrannywilson
    grannywilson

    Answer by grannywilson at 11:06 PM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • Drugs!? They change a person. He's spending his money on drugs and concerts. Wow, that doesn't sound like a great dad. Sure he's probably not thinking straight. (depending on the drug) I don't think you should risk raising your kids with someone who is addicted to any illegal substance. It really sends the wrong message. It doesn't sound like there's much to be in love with. (jobless, inconsiderate, immature...) I'd end it unless he can get clean and get his life in order immediately. Don't feed into his addiction and let him live a happy life despite his wrongs. Let him hit rock bottom. Maybe then he'll make a change. But don't count on it.
    2bennettmom

    Answer by 2bennettmom at 11:21 PM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • I agree with above posters...the drugs would definitely make my choice for me. That is no environment to raise children in, even if he isn't doing them in the house...yet. First of all, would you want to leave the kids with him not knowing if they were truly safe because he was doing drugs? Secondly, how would you feel if because you turned a blind eye to it you children were taken away from you, knowing that you could very well have avoided such heartache. I know that it certainly is not going to be easy for you to make this decision, especially with what you are going through and being that you are pregnant now, but it is absolutely necessary.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:23 PM on Jul. 3, 2009

  • ....................... just thought you could use some periods in those paragraphs.
    lol.
    Hope it works out for you, but as the others said; drugs are a dealbreaker. Time to do what's best for you and children. That doesn't include living with a druggie.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:28 PM on Jul. 3, 2009

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