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Should I tell my crazy grandparents they will have their first great-grandchild?

My grandparents are getting crazier with age (and more and more prescription medications.) My grandparents (mom's parents) have always been nice to me until I became an adult. Now I believe I am fair game to torture. I have limited my exposure to them since I sensed this new attitude coming, and so have not subjected myself to the verbal abuse my mother has gone through. Two years ago we stopped talking to them altogether after my mom visited. They called her and told her my grandma (her mom) had cancer and that she would need to quit work and come out there to help them immediately. (MY GRANDMA DID NOT HAVE CANCER, just a routine surgery) After being there a few days my grandpa informed her that he was tired of pretending he loved her and sending Christmas and birthday cards. Now I'm pregnant, but I feel guilty for not telling them. Do they have a right to know, or should I continue to protect myself from them?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 12:16 PM on Jul. 4, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (5)
  • Why not just allow your mother to tell them. You will not be exposed to their craziness that way.

    Answer by momtoeight at 12:25 PM on Jul. 4, 2009

  • i'd tell them & leave it at that. you don't want to give them more reason to resent you for"hiding their great-grandchild" . after that, just leave it to them to involve themselves or not. but if you feel they are still bringing negativity upon your family, then continue avoiding them.

    Answer by rAbella at 12:26 PM on Jul. 4, 2009

  • send a card

    Answer by admckenzie at 1:35 PM on Jul. 4, 2009

  • Your job, first and foremost, is to protect your child. If a relationship with your grandparents will hurt you or your child, then it's best to not let them become involved. There doesn't seem to be a relationship there anyway. They are only a part of your life because of DNA, not because of love.

    Answer by Goggle at 2:06 PM on Jul. 4, 2009

  • Why tell them? Will your child be affected in a good way from knowing them? Doesn't sound like it to me.

    Answer by misselphaba at 2:28 PM on Jul. 4, 2009

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