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Who and How can ppl do this?

I hear often about people getting a divorce, or splitting up after a serious relationship ect...pregnant or NOT pregnant (with kids) Then like BEFORE the divorce is even final....about 2-3 months after the split, they are ENGAGED?! Why wouldnt you give yourself a break, to figure out what went wrong in your previous relationship? How can ppl move on just so easily? Especially when kids are involved?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 2:25 PM on Jul. 4, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • I think there are some people who don't think about the effects of adult relationships on kids (i.e. people coming in and out of their lives) and I think a lot of the reasoning behind people doing the type of thing that you are describing comes from their fear of being alone and/or being a parent alone.

    Answer by ajguinn at 2:27 PM on Jul. 4, 2009

  • Because it's nature of the beast to seek greener pastures so to speak. I'm not saying it's right or wrong, it just is

    Answer by Zakysmommy at 2:27 PM on Jul. 4, 2009

  • My friend does that. She is 40 and just got married for the 4th time. I do not kid you when I say that as soon as 1 husband is gone she will have a guy living with her within 2 weeks. That is her MO she absolutley cannot be without a man. And I hate the example she is setting for her 4 daughters. She is basically raising the to think you can't ever be without a man or you need a man to take care of you. This last divorce 1 of her daughters asked her not to move another guy is so quick. My friend told her daughter "no I will move anyone I want in, because ya'll will be gone in a few years and I do not want to be alone." I mean how selfish are you that your own kid asks you not to let a man move in because it is too soon and you say no?

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:32 PM on Jul. 4, 2009

  • rebounding due to fear of being alone, is probably the most common reason.

    Answer by VeronicaLee at 3:10 PM on Jul. 4, 2009

  • I had a friend who CAN'T be without a man. One month, she is happily married, the next month, living with another guy. Then she started dating her divorce attorney, for G-d's sake! When that didn't work out, she started to call my husband two and three times a day. I put a quick stop to that.

    My kids' well-being is more important than my libido. I wouldn't put them through that.


    Answer by mancosmomma at 5:09 PM on Jul. 4, 2009

  • Well, while it is not true in all cases, I think sometimes you are just over the relationship before it ends. My ex and I were married for 3 yrs, and I think I knew at pretty 2 yr mark that we weren't going to last. So, by the time I got tired of his cheating and lying and said I wanted a divorce, it had already been a yr since I realized it wasn't going to last. I'd had that whole yr to come to terms with the idea that we weren't going to be together anymore and to sort of start the moving on process in my mind, if that makes sense. Now, with that said, I also didn't date for about a yr after my divorce, and I am only now in my first serious, and possibly permanent relationship since the divorce, and it's been almost 6 yrs. Other than what I just described, I think it boils down to fear of being alone or they just didn't invest that much of themselves in the relationship to begin with.

    Answer by tropicalmama at 7:21 PM on Jul. 4, 2009

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