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How to get my 19 almost 20 month old to listen.

OK so my DD will not listen. I mean I will say something and she says no. She will laugh at me when I try and discipline her. I just tried for 5 mins to put her and keep her on a time out. All she did was sit and laugh at me. She has drawn on my walls which I had to scrub and I tried to get her to do it you know to teach her and asked her if it was fun she said mmhmmm. She simply will not listen to me her grandma who we live with or her father who she does not see THAT often maybe twice a week (we are not together but good friends and he works) The only thing is is that when we are at her dads and he yells at her or even says to stop nicely she will scream like someone is killing her. She laughs at me. PLease mommas HELP!!!!

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Asked by delilahsmom1177 at 5:59 PM on Jul. 4, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 19 (7,071 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • Well, she is acting her age right now. It will be hard to actually get her to listen and follow directions at this age because to her, the world is a playground.At this age keeping writing things out of her way would be a good idea.Keeping doing the NO thing and showing her right from wrong and eventually she will get it.This is JMO

    Answer by Kat122 at 6:04 PM on Jul. 4, 2009

  • 1. put up the things she's marking the walls with 2) if she does get them make her help you wash the walls 3) time out is not for little ones who can't understand the concept you are trying to convey. She's a little one. She only knows how to play. That's why she thinks everything you are doing is playtime. Be with her when she has crayons so you can show her to draw on paper. Don't leave her alone with markers, etc. Or buy paint that is made to wash it off easily but that's not teaching her not to do it. I'd hate to think she's an artist and stifle her creativity but show her to do it on paper. As for the idiot who yells at her, children learn what they live so she'll learn to yell right back. Show her what you DO want her to do. Show her where to draw. Show her the positive and she'll do it. When she's older she'll get the time out thing but not now. Oh, and yelling might hurt her ears so tell them to stop yelling at her

    Answer by admckenzie at 6:07 PM on Jul. 4, 2009

  • It's normal. Be patient, be persistent, and be consistent. She'll get there.


    Answer by kaycee14 at 6:08 PM on Jul. 4, 2009

  • Just be consistant. If you are going to do timeouts, do them every time. If you just ignore it it will continue.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:09 PM on Jul. 4, 2009

  • I feel your pain, my DD is 19 months also. When Kaylee does something wrong we tell her NO, bad baby! Which dont work but I am trying for consistency. If she hits or pinches we put her in "baby jail" (her playpen) just for about a minute or 2 and that has been working pretty well. At this age it normal for them not to understand, just remember to smile she wont be little forever. Also if you have a junior Van Gogh like I do you have to get the Crayola washable Crayons they are awesome!!!!!


    Answer by deneejude at 6:23 PM on Jul. 4, 2009

  • I agree that you should be consistent about your punishments. The time out should only be the length of their age...3 years old...3 minutes... and put her somewhere where she has no stimuli to be distracted or want to play during her time out. Just keep at it, and do not let her up until she sits still the entire time. She may laugh because she thinks she is cute and wants to get out of her punishments. Yes, she will try screaming also. Just ignore it, and the time out doesn't start until she stops screaming. I do not agree that you should let the child write on the walls. Teach her acceptable things to write on, like paper. Another method that has always worked for me is distraction...if you see her starting to do something that you know is wrong, interrupt her thought process by introducing her to a few other toys, games, or activities that she is allowed to play with.

    Answer by MontessoriMo226 at 6:38 PM on Jul. 4, 2009

  • Whatever happened to a good spanking? A 20-month-old is too young to understand the significance of a time-out. Give her a smack on the bottom, she'll learn.

    Take away materials that are messy. Only let her use crayons/etc. when supervised.

    Answer by Mousuke at 7:37 PM on Jul. 4, 2009

  • Mousuke I have tried that also. I am not an anti-spanking mom I am a you don not listen you get a good old fashioned spanking; However she will cry and that is it. She will go do whatever she was doing. With the crayons I went to the bathroom and she drew on the bathroom door. I do not know how may times I have given her the hand tap and said no drawing on the walls. She does get the time out thing she is very smart but it still does not work. I sit her down for 1 min since she is 1 year old. Still nothing.

    Answer by delilahsmom1177 at 9:11 AM on Jul. 5, 2009

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