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An affair....no bashing please....

I've been seeing this guy for sometime now the only problem is he is married. I'm still technically married too my divorce will be finalized soon. I'm falling in love with this amazing man that I have to share. We have so much in common. The other problem is that we work for the same company. We started out as friends then it just happened we decided to meet for bfast before work and ever since then we see each other every morning before work. We talk, we listen, we kiss, we hold each other, we even go on walks at the park. We keep it on the down low at work and it seems no one has a clue. He has talked about leaving his wife but is worrried about his girls. I know our odds are not good but I'm just wondering if anyone has everyone been in the same situation and the relationship actually worked???

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:36 PM on Jul. 5, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • You are the other woman, and will only ever be the other woman. Not only that but if he does ditch the wife, how long until he finds another other woman?

    Get out now and be glad you did. You should split with him and see if he loves you enough to break it off with his wife, either way you will still have your self respect.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:40 PM on Jul. 5, 2009

  • I agree completely with the first poster.

    JeremysMom

    Answer by JeremysMom at 9:44 PM on Jul. 5, 2009

  • I agree with the first poster about splitting up until he isn't married. You DO NOT want to be the "other woman". If it's true love, he'll leave her. I do not believe in staying married for the kids. Sometimes that makes it so much more difficult for them. And you can't help who you fall in love with. I'm sure it would be REALLY hard for you to end it. :( Hope it works out for you.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:24 PM on Jul. 5, 2009

  • I am sure there are some that work out but let him get his divorce then do it the right way
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:33 PM on Jul. 5, 2009

  • Honestly if he doesn't have enough respect for a women he's made a promise to and a women who's given him children to be up front with her and end that relationship BEFORE starting a relatioship with you or anyone else what makes you think he won't (or isn't already) doing the same to you??

    Get out while you can and honestly give his wife the respect you want for youself.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:01 PM on Jul. 5, 2009

  • All the above and more to get out... first of all is he still living with his wife???
    mybabyjr

    Answer by mybabyjr at 11:20 PM on Jul. 5, 2009

  • I completely agree with the above posters. Let this man work out his marriage issues ON HIS OWN first. If he does leave his wife, than by all means feel free to date him! But don't be a factor in the breakdown of this family. You will be hurt, he will be hurt, his wife will be hurt, and his innocent children will be hurt (and will likely blame you for any breakup, which should be fun if you ever take on the 'stepmom' role.) I'm sorry, but this is just potential heartbreak for everyone involved and I would step back from this in a hurry. JMO, since you asked!
    Freela

    Answer by Freela at 11:59 PM on Jul. 5, 2009

  • let him sort his life out.. He could possibly be at a crossroads in his life and you happen to be there for him. Doesn't mean you are the one he needs... Let him sort his life out.. Stop clouding his judgement on what he needs to do with his wife... He may be telling you she is one thing, but I guarentee she is a hurt women with children who is wondering why you are not leaving her man alone... FIND YOUR OWN MAN, LEAVE HERS ALONE.... If he officially and legally leaves her, then he is all yours... I don't care how terrible a man might say his marrige is, I would never ever be "the other women" grow up, stay out of his life, he is committed to another!... Find your own man, and then see what it is like when he cheats because you are not enough for him!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:17 AM on Jul. 8, 2009

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