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Frustrated and confused!! please help from ( christians only please) no offense

Hi. I want a christian to answer this because i want to know what you think God would want me to do. First off this is a little long, but please hang in there i need you. Ok so im a 24yr old mom of 3, im a recovering alcoholic. Ok so i use to have people that wanted to be around me and my husband and kids all the time, my parents would come over and want us to come to there home, and the same with hubbys parents, and we had unlimited friends, but when we sobered up and turned our live to God, my parents never call( who are still drinking) they ignore my call and only answer the phone twice a month, we moved closer to my hubbys mom 1min at the end of her street because she said she would come around more if we lived closer, but she only comes around 1 time a month( she is still drinking too). So all grandparents only see my kids 1 time a month even my mother in law whos a street over, and it feels like a pity visit. CONTINUED>

 
angels4262

Asked by angels4262 at 12:45 AM on Jul. 6, 2009 in Religion & Beliefs

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Answers (13)
  • My MIL is a recovering alcoholic. We wrote her a letter and told her that if she did not get some help, she could not see us or her grandchild. It took some time, and we kept true to our word but she eventually got help and has been in recovery. She also quit smoking :-)

    I don't think God wants to you enable someone to drink. Enabling them, in this case, is to allow them what they want (to see your kids) despite the fac that they're not appropriate to be in front of children. You need to put your foot down and say "either the drinking goes or YOU go." By letting them "have their cake and eat it too" (for lack of a better phrase), they have no need to change. I also don't think that God wants any emotional or psychological harm to come to your children. It's your duty as a mother to protect them from that, even from their own grandparents. Good luck!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:14 AM on Jul. 6, 2009

  • continued. well we also went for forth of july yesterday to a big 4hr church festival my hubbys mom showed up for the last 10min, drunk, and acted like she was going to pivck up my 1yr old, but picked up my 2yr old( who is her favoritew because she looks like her) on top of that. Im bitter now, everytime i see them or my parents i become bitter, i don't want to hate but i am a outspoken person, also very loyal and very loving, I use to rage out in the wrong way, now i do it kinder, i know God wants me to keep my outspokeness, i jsut am confused shoul i cut them out of the kids life? should i even answer there calls, they bring me down and make me bitter
    angels4262

    Answer by angels4262 at 12:49 AM on Jul. 6, 2009

  • the fact she was drunk, why in the world di you let her take the kid? that was wrong.
    maybe at this point...........you need to help her..she needs something orsomeone to help her
    moki1984

    Answer by moki1984 at 12:50 AM on Jul. 6, 2009

  • she didn't take the kids, we met her there
    angels4262

    Answer by angels4262 at 12:51 AM on Jul. 6, 2009

  • I would tell them like my mom told her father when i was born (he was an alcoholic)
    "You are not allowed to see or talk to the children until you get treatment to sober up."
    this way you are trying to get them some help and if they refuse then it is their lose for not wanting to have a relationship with their grand children. I hope you find answers that you are looking for a peace within them.
    2wndrfl_btrflys

    Answer by 2wndrfl_btrflys at 12:53 AM on Jul. 6, 2009

  • corection on that, she only picked up as holding not taking her, i would never let a drunk person drive drunk with my babys
    angels4262

    Answer by angels4262 at 12:55 AM on Jul. 6, 2009

  • I just am struggling to find out what God would want me to do?
    angels4262

    Answer by angels4262 at 12:55 AM on Jul. 6, 2009

  • your right anon, thanks, i just care so much about doing what God wants, i told my mom that and she still wants to drink, do i say it or write it straight out, or just make excuses to not come over?

    angels4262

    Answer by angels4262 at 1:23 AM on Jul. 6, 2009

  • oh ok good no driving.

    if you go tthru this........................maybe you are meant to help her thru it? or at least say HEY..you gotta do this....tough love is required sometimes.
    moki1984

    Answer by moki1984 at 1:32 AM on Jul. 6, 2009

  • i toughed loved her. i recently gave my mom and my mother in law an altimatum and they just don't care
    angels4262

    Answer by angels4262 at 1:36 AM on Jul. 6, 2009