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Is your 4 yr old in any way similar? Pls helpppppppppppp

My 4 yr old girl suddenly cant do this and cant do that......she has yet to master putting her tops on due to me doing it and is reluctant to try. She can do pants, shoes, socks undies etc but again has trouble with tops......Lately she just wont try and takes alot of positive encouragement to try, if its a good day i can try to encourage her to take her top off and by helping her if needed........i realise i should have let her try a long time ago......why do i panic about something so small? I have been having lots of challenging behaviour lately, more challenging than ever so dressing herself is just something that adds to the nightmare......anyone else having a hard time with their 4 yr old? plsssssssssss help

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Asked by Anonymous at 7:13 AM on Jul. 6, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (6)
  • I think it's probably just a phase. My son did that when he was around 3 or 4. If positive encouragement doesn't work, you can also try just being really busy. I found for my son it was better if when he wanted me to help him with his shirt, I just said, "Oh, Mommy is really busy right now doing (insert some chore here). I can't help you right now. Why don't you see if you can do it?" He was very impatient, so even though he didn't want to do it himself, the thought of having to wait for me was even worse. :)

    Answer by tropicalmama at 7:25 AM on Jul. 6, 2009

  • My friends 4yo DD acts in a stubborn, moody, demanding type of way. If she dosent get something right within the first 2 tries she'll give up & needs a lot of encouragement to continue trying. She pouts an awful lot, refuses to poop on the toilet, etc. My other friends 3yo is also acting in this way as well. I would say that it is a stage but, I dont personally have a 4yo yet.
    I sometimes get way too stressed out over something very little as well. Like u said its not that little thing its just the combination of everything all piled up. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed w/ things to do & places to go & be. This feeling always passes by & I'm fine again for a while. Ur DD will get the whole putting her shirt on thing dont worry & just slow down a little bit & take a breather or whatever it is u need to do to destress urself.

    Answer by Mel30248 at 7:46 AM on Jul. 6, 2009

  • My daughter is five and is a pro at dressing and undressing. try telling her you taking her to a certain place or activity and see if she manages to get dress as quickly as mine. She has no problems including shoes, she is just always dressing and undressing since she was approx. 1. Meanwhile my 9 year old son is still making me put on his shoes and this year I said if you want to go out you have to put them on yourself... well his shoes are going on without a problem. Step back don't help her get her, get her up much sooner before you going out and maybe getting her some new shirts with characters she will love and see if that works...........sometimes when they really want too they will. It will pass...... every child is different. not a biggy.

    Answer by Lil4babies at 7:51 AM on Jul. 6, 2009

  • I think it is a phase they go through. My oldest will be 4 next month and she gets soo frustrated if she can't do something the first time she tries. I tell her to try and if she needs help to ask and she can try again tomorrow. I think the more I ask her to try the more frustrated she gets. If i get her to try once a day i'm happy and leave her alone. I know one day soon she will get it on her own, but it has to be on her terms and when she is ready.

    Answer by suebee3 at 9:11 AM on Jul. 6, 2009

  • yea your kid is just thinking well mommy does it for me, so i dont want to try. i dont have a 4 year old my daughter is 2 but i have taked care of a 4 year old and ever one i come across has acted that way. the child just needs some encouragment tell them that big kids do this themselves, it may take a lot of coaching and time but when they finally do it just celebrate it. dance clap say good girl/boy and give them a big hug they love that kind of encouragment and they will strive to show you they can do it all by themselves. it works for just about all toddlers between 2 and 4. i have started doing it for my daughter and she loves the attention she gets from it.

    Answer by nattysmommie at 11:39 AM on Jul. 6, 2009

  • my 4 year old has been a nightmare too. not so much with dressing but with everything else! i hope its a phase cuz i dont know how much more i can take.. without pulling mmy hair out!

    Answer by amandap1705 at 2:58 PM on Jul. 6, 2009

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